Rhymes with Yawn

Yep that's who won/found true love.

Yawwwn....I'm tired! This love journey was exhausting and 3 hours of this tonight.

Shawn got the go!  Nick got the heave-ho.

And some details
Nick's beard...maybe I'm reading too much into this show..(like my English 100 prof said to me.."you're looking for symbolism where there is none" :( Whatever...I'm just super deep. hahaha..
But I thought it was funny that Nick started looking a bit primal. Me thinks (that's kinda Shakespearean right?)..Nick wanteth to looketh like Shawneth.

The gifts
Nick's gift...he says it's in the bedroom (lol...I'm sure a lot of men think their gift is in the bedroom..) But Nick he meant literally it was in the bedroom). Why couldn't he get up and  retrieve it..hmm one last visit to bedroom before the engagement perhaps? Revive some some Dublin lovin' memories?? The gift looked like a frame from Winners. I'm not looking a gift horse in the mouth..I"m just calling a spade a spade. Yes..very cliche statements..but this show if full of cliches.

Shawn's gift...looks like he went to Michael's and bought the jar.at least Shawn's gift seemed like it was thoughtful.

The Balcony contemplation
The day of the proposal..most bachelors  or bachelorettes contemplate by windowside or typically on a balcony..guys with less than 15% body fat tend to contemplate best with their shirts off..(Maybe they engage their six packs erstwhile...Bachelorettes typically are in a flow dress or a housecoat usually with a coffee or journal. Kaitlyn was in a housecoat..Nick kept his shirt on..and Shawn..shirtless..(and that's always okay Shawn..)

Btw..Shawn must have had access to a weight room and ample lean protein during the season...because he looked excellent while thinking really hard...He was even taking notes so he could recite all of his feelings to Kaitlyn...(he's be a good Toastmaster..hey Shawn..if ever in Edmonton..please drop by our club as a visitor:)



Neil Lane visit
I found  this Neil Lane visit especially funny. Neil Lane's engagement ring suitcase looks like the suitcase-type box where my sister keeps her fancy cutlery . You'd think that Neil Lane's diamonds would have a  be like a bullet proof metal case that is handcuffed to his wrist. I don't think Neil watches the show...he had no idea who Nick was...all he cared bout is that people said "Neil Lane" a few times on this show. The rings were huge...I can't comment on the C's. I'm clueless about the C's...doesn't matter DeBeers has us all convinced they are valuable.

The Proposal
Nick's suit looks like it got a bit tight..and he still had his stacked beaded bracelets on. Seriously? Nick is first out the limo. Yeesh...this limo should not have rolled in..why did she make Nick stay and then almost propose to her. I do agree with Nick...I wouldn't have wanted to stick around and here her  cry about how much she loved him in the moment. I would have been.."Ok"..gotta return this ring. and hit the airport.you can't console the person you are breaking up with...Nick was rejected..walked out by Kaitlyn..into the limo he went and then he kinda chucked the Neil Lane ring (but chucked it where he find it later to give back to NL..who probably won't recognize it a second time) and he threw the Irish bands they bought in Dublin....I'm sure the guy that cleans the limos will find the ring before next season:)

Shawn
That guy looks good with or without a shirt..I loved his black tie! Smashing!! He was delightful and eloquent and heartfelt...Kaitlyn kinda was holding back but then said..she would be faithful to him 4-evah! I hope so...I think Shawn's a good guy.

They are happy...for now..hopefully they work.

After the rose..
this was long and unnecessary.
Nick seems like he's done some growing. no..not just his beard..but as a person..he didn't seem angry..and looked like he wanted to make the best of it.
Chris asked questions to try to fan flames.
Shawn still harbours ill will toward Nick..Shawn you gotta put down that 100 lb plate of hate down:)
Both Kaitlyn and Shawn's hair looks darker.
Kaitlyn feels like it's Christmas day because they can to to Starbucks or Tim hortons together (umm i think only Starbucks is open on Christmas Day ) lol.

Who is the next bachelor..i'm guessing Ben H.
Yeesh..did you see Bachelor Pad previews...looks like a a lot of conjugal  congenial activities that will be happening of the on this upcoming season.

Until next time Bachelor/Bachelorette faithful..I LOVE THIS SHOW!!

Men re-tell all

Not much happened.
At all. Except that the preview for Bachelor Paradise seems like a recipe for emotional instability.

Ian awkwardly got down on his knees (after he took off his jacket)..and apologized to the guys.
Nice that some of the guys accepted his apology.
I did think it was funny when one of the guys said that princeton needs to teach a course on how not to be an a$$hole.

Clint and JJ- they were intellectually curious about each other..and JJ said there was a lot of meat for him. You can't make this stuff up.

There was more time given to whether Nick should have been on the show...oh let's give that up already.

Ben Z has still not shed a tear.
The other Ben thinks it's a common fear that people think they're unloveable. Aww Ben..I love the sharing:)

Jared shaved!! (and Chris H also disliked the patchy beard..way to go Chris).. Is Jared such an emotionally evolved guy....or is he super nice , can't believe he got this far...and is just being polite.
I'm not sure...I don't get his appeal.
I do think he was waxed and shaped his eybrows some more..i guess he was on a roll with cleaning up the beard.

Oooo..this was new..cyber Kaitlyn hate.
What the? Whoa..why are people so angry at Kaitlyn? If you don't like the show ..turn it off...and it seems like these people are so so angry. It seems like Kaitlyn takes it as well as she can. It's a dating show people..that is not grounded in reality....dating is supposed to be fun.
Yeesh...I think that Jared.aka Captain Love..should help some of those haters out.

Kaitlyn was wearing a sparkly dress...She faced the guys with aplomb.
She made homophobic remarks about JJ and Clint...that was a bit below the belt...so to speak.
She called out that guy who accused her of not taking her bachelorette role seriously and then bringing Nick it..and he originally voted for Britt. Good one Kaitlyn.

Next week..who is she going to choose?
I think it might be Nick...and why is she crying so much..
Until next week...I LOVE THIS SHOW!

Nick and Shawn...part trois

Hindsight is 20/20...it should have been clear that it would be between Nick and Shawn.

It's FOD date continuation... and 'hometown' dates in Utah?
I missed it..why did they meet in Utah?
First the FODs..they all went "so well"..according to Kaitlyn...so there must been a lot of..umm..sharing...

Ben's overnight went well...even Kaitlyn said she only had 1/2 hour of sleep. They were in a castle.
Next is Sean...
The golfed.
As per usual...Kaitlyn makes Sean bare all..this time literally..Kaitlyn won at golf and made Sean golf the last hole naked..then she ran off with his clothes..Sean seems comfortable naked...when he runs..everything looks good..even with a black box:)
At "dinner"...food at a table placed in front of them..Kaitlyn brings up the "other guy's name"...I think she wanted to know if the Eskimo event happened if he is a playah. That only inflamed Shawn.
They don't eat dinner (I wonder how they have enough energy on the FOD...they must be dehydrated and carb depleted)...butthere is not romance when Sean reads the date card. He's like "yep..let's do it".
Let's face it..Shawn is not eloquent.
They spend the night...in the morning..there is not longing looks at each other in the morning light...it's just Shawn in his sweats (sans backpack)..he's so rugged he doesn't need toiletries..They just say ..'see yo later"
nick happens to be leaning against a building that Shawn passes by..and they try to conversate. That doesn't go over well..they still hate each other.

Back in USA and in Utah.
Why Utah again? They are at a lovely hotel nestled in the mountains...but it did look kind of lacklustre and cold compared to the backdrop of Ireland...maybe because Ireland was so lush and green and historic...

Pre-family date: Nick tells Kaitlyn he loves her of sho.
Family dates..
The group cry- Nick's family...
Irish wakes are way more lively than the mood in the room while they were waiting for Nick..Nick went through heartbreak...and they were all so sad...and crying..even Nicks' little sister had a cry..while they sat in a big circle.

They all...loved Kaitlyn after..
MOST AWKWARD MOMENT OF THE SHOW: Nick tells his mom how great the make-outs are.
Whah???

Supporitive sisters with bad outfits and Shawns' dad and aunt.
Sorry sistahs...but really..you coulda stepped up the outfits. maybe if Kaitlyn ends up with Shawn she an help..the boot situation with Megan..and the accessory and top situation with Jessie.
I liked how Shawn and his dad wore matching shirts..I'm not sure why Aunt Carolyn was there...and why Shawn's mom couldn't make it...

Verdict..they love Kaitlyn...

Post famlily date: Shawn tells her that he loves her.

then Kaitlyn goes back to her room and cries...looks like tears of ..."yikes..I don't think i like Shawn that much"...

The final decision is in TWO WEEKS!!
next week..is men tell all...

Until next week..I LOVE THIS SHOW!

This may be the most dramatic season ever....

for Nick and Shawn...
I'm not sure if y'all felt it..but there were a few nail biting parts.

Ben...who's Ben...seriously...this guy is a bit like filler...like the breadcrumbs in a meat loaf..actually I've never made a meat loaf...but I hear there is a filler.
The meaty parts of the show are Nick and Shawn. Ok..so Shawn is way more beefy:)

Ben had a date..he shared feelings with Kaitlyn. The only things that were remarkable about that date were that we confirmed that Ben is not a virgin, that he feels unloveable :(, Kaitlyn thinks he's loveable :) and finally..I"m pretty sure Ben colours his hair black.



3 on 1- the chilly group date
Shawn, Nick, Joe. Joe who?  Oh the Joe guy with an accent.  Joe's faux hawk was looking rough..that's not the only thing that was faux...and that was Kaitlyn's feelings for Joe.
Right when Joe tells Kaitlyn he's super serious..she pulls the plug. Joe looks super angry..and on that very cool crisp day..Joe suddenly turns ice cold to Kaitlyn. Must be tough to get rejected after you totally open up to someone.

Kaitlyn feels shaken...she tells Nick that she needs more time with Shawn.

Kaitlyn tells Shawn about the 'gone to far' date. Yeesh..I thought Joe's bad news was tough....but I thought she had to tell Shawn.
What a weird position (not literally) to be in. But Shawn chooses to hang in there...after he goes to collect himself in the Gents room. He actually had great decorum..or maybe I was distracted how good he looked in his shirt. Good job Shawn..I think..I guess.. sorry I got distracted by the abs I could practically see through your shirt. He is staying for Kaitlyn.

Mid-show rose ceremony (ugh..i hate mid-show rose ceremony)

Jared is released. Either Jared is a super grounded guy that has released his ego...or he really wasn't ready for a big R relationship so he's secretly relieved that he gets to go home. Jared..a golf clap for you.you very genteel demeanour when you got the obligatory bench talk enroute to the black car.

Nick's date
Why doesn't Nick enunciate...he mumbles so often..and he often puts his hands in front of his mouth when he talks...do you think this means subconsciously he doesn't really want to say what he is saying or he doesn't mean it.
What I did understand is that Nick said some unflattering things about Shawn. I had to urban dictionary eskimo brother. Hmm..maybe this isn't the best use of my brain cells...when I consult urban dictionary rather than the Oxford dictionary..I think my IQ is declining.
Kaitlyn and Nick check out a cathedral...Nick talks about this boyhood confessions...they go to a pub..talk to more locals who are easier to understand than Nick. Then they go to a jail for dinner..don't eat...then off to the FOD at the Fota hotel....
Later at breakfast...they discussed bacon....and umm..not much else. I'm not sure what Kaitlyn finds interesting about Nick.

More about Shawn and Nick
Shawn tracks Nick down...the hotel is totally ok with not keeping customer information confidential.
Shawn strides over in his well fitting jeans and t-shit to Nick's cabin....Shawn sits down to call him out on how disingenuous Nick is. Nick sure gets Shawn's knickers in a knot:)

Will Kaitlyn let Shawn go....we'll have to wait
Until Next Week....

and I LOVE THIS SHOW:)

The Nick and Shawn Report

The Bachelorette was brought to you by Nick and Shawn.

I see Nick more than Chris Harrison...and I think Shawn might have had as much airtime as Kaitlyn.
ShYawn:
We start with Shawn and Kaityn on the couch..(that will happen again). The suspense..does he know or doesn't he. I thought that situation is like what I've heard psychologists say...you reality is the stories you tell yourself. So interesting..both times Shawn and Kaitlyn had couch time..she was convincing herself

J, JJ and K
They sail to an island together...and sit on a communal blanket. Joe has 1:1 time with her..then JJ has time..where he discloses he cheated on his wife. Yeesh..this guy... She picks Joe..and both of them sail away..with JJ watching...

Joe has some one on one time with Kaitlyn..where he proceeds to make out with her whilst holding his drink. Really? You can't put it down?

Kaitlyn goes back to her room...but she won't be alone for long..Shawn has been ruminating and needs to share his cud. Round 2...about midway she realizes that Shawn doesn't know about the Nick rendez-vous. Then she changes her tone..and she gets on him about how much reassurance he needs. It's an interesting turn of events.

Cocktail party/Rose ceremony:
Yes..it is still mid-show..the show is not back on its regular cycle...
At the beginning she states she's nervous..and she has made mistakes (who hasn't sistah Kaitlyn)..
Both Bens get 1:1 time..and of course Shawn..

Tanner and Ben Z are kicked to the curb..the wrong side of the curb..since it's Ireland.

Road trip going' to Blarney and Killarney
On this road trip Kaitlyn picks Jared to drive with. I still don't see the Jared appeal..let me try:
...he's not needy (bonus), he can grow (patchy) facial hair, he looks good in a skinny suit, they could share hair product, he can calculate a 20% tip like nobody's business (okay..i'm reaching)....but I don't get it really get it. The other boys are in the big busy.

Shawn snores loudly:) he's still cute even though he's nervous and a snorer. Maybe breathe-right strips would work on him...i betcha he's look cute in Breathe-right strips (and that's it:)

Jared and Kaitlyn stop to kiss the Blarney stone. Jared strikes me as not very masculine, nor very reassuring.

At Killarney...
Chris pops in to tell her there are more shake-ups on this season...3 guys will be going forward, then FOD then hometowns. I wonder if that was purely budget cuts...the FOD will happen in Ireland...that saves on travel...then they go back to 'Merica. Chris says that she will get off camera time just to keep things even and to get to know the guys on a deep level. Oh Chris..so fair.

Date with Cupcake man
Note..this was the quietest helicopter date ever. Did they have silencers on the helicopter blades..are helicopters quieter in Ireland. It was such a smooth ride..well..until they go to the Cliiffs of Moher.
Chris....seems like a good catch on paper...I get why Kaitlyn gave him the heave-ho. Their one on one time seemed to last 8 minutes..and no sooner than he said he doesn't want to leave Nashville..that Kaitlyn broke down..because she doesn't get why she's saying no to the well coiffed, well groomed, well positioned dentist who arrived to the show in a cupcake (btw, I found it unprofessional that he arrived in a food that accelerates dental caries development. Shady dentist). Kaitlyn, I'll explain why you are saying no to him. BECAUSE YOU DON'T LIKE HIM.
Bad judgement call to leave the weeping Chris so close to the edge..the producers should have moved him further from the edge  before interviewing him.

So now Kaitlyn is down to 5!! two more to go..
Until then
I LOVE THIS SHOW!!!

Do you have to let it linger?

Bachelorette Producers...I'm talking to you...Do you have to let it linger? do you have to? do you have to?
The was one very drawn own episode.. EVEN THOUGH I had the good fortune of watching  PVR'd episode..(Thanks Jo-Ann). Despite that..it still felt it plodded along at a snail's pace and there were so much lingering.
For example:

• Ian's rudeness to Kaitlyn, then the Ode to Bachelor Ian in the van
• Nick's one on one with Kaitlyn ( I think that date was an hour..with 5 minutes of breathy clips)
• Shawn't gradual downward spiral
• Nick..yep..too much Nick
• the show's disruption of the normal order of the program i.e. end with a rose ceremony

Some observations
-the irony of Ian debasing Kaitlyn and focusing on the point that she was shallow...but in the van ride his last comment was not "Ugh..I'm just dying to know if the EU is going to extend sanctions on Russia or what is going on in Syria" but rather "I need sex".  The only thing Ian has in common with intelligentsia is that they both start with the letter I.
- was Jared's scruff always patchy..or is the what I notice when I watch on a TV screen that is larger that 32 inches? While I"m on patchiness..why didn't Josh even out his head shave.and did Ian have an abrasion on the left side of his head?
- How did Nick kick so high during the Irish dancing when his pants were so tight? Lycra?
-Was anyone surprised that Nick could lift Kaitlyn with one arm? Not that Katilyn is particularly heavy..but the only think I can see Nick lifting is a stylish messenger back that holds his Macbook air and maybe a bottle of Kombucha.
-What was with Nick's numerous beaded bracelets. Is that a thing? Are they prayer beads. He's so casual..but he's not effortless...stacking 5 beaded bracelts is purposeful. Maybe they're magnetic?? That's the only reason I could think that Kaitlyn is drawn to Nick.
-Shawn remains hot. I also think he will have a meltdown..not due to his hotness..but his anxiousness about Kaitlyn.
-Who was Kaitlyn talking to on the patio after her breathy night with Nick?
-why would Kaitlyn give the rose to Jared instead of Shawn on the group date.
-What is going to happen next week? Does Kaitlyn tell the guys? does she think Shawn knows and she spills the beans??? AGH!!!! Until next week..

I LOVE THIS SHOW...

So many messes in Texas

Leftover rose ceremony..
Did I mention that I don't enjoy this new format of the Bachelorette.. I kinda forget what happened last week and who is going to let go. All I know is that it takes a Canadian to dress properly for what looked like a very chilly rose ceremony. While it likely helped the roses stay fresh..some of the guys looked like they were frozen. I betcha Nick wished her wore his hoodie.

No misteppin' for Ben
Ah the two step. People take that dance seriously..just a few months ago..i was almost two stepped over at Cook County by a couple that had centrifugal force on their side...while I didn't get trampled I got whipped by her long hair.  But back to the show.
Ben is going to a two stepping competition with Kaitlyn..Ben seems down with it all..and they were coached by champion Debbie. There were parallels drawn to dancing and relationships..which i happen to agree with..you have to trust, know each other's moves, have to be in sync..and care about each other...and the last point the woman make..the most important thing is love...Adorbs.

While they didn't last long in the competition, Ben does have staying power..but I found the dinner conversation underwelming. This is date number #427 where the couple does not touch the food on their plates. Ben says vague things about his long distance relationship. He also said when he's with Kaitlyn it's a lot of fun...blah blah..he gets the rose.


Ay ya ya ya...the group date

The group date. 10 guys need to seranade Kaitlyn. It was a bit of an A ya ya yawn. The seranades weren't that great. Nick, with is previous bachelorette wisdom, says you just have to own it. Nick's advice on how to deal in annoying. I can see why its bugs Josh so. Turns out the Josh is highly malleable in Nick's presence. I had big hopes for Ian's performance..but he choked again. And this bothered him. a lot. Nick's performance wasn't so awesome..he just took her up to a balcony to serande her. I'm not sure if there is a handbook on seranading, but isn't the serenader supposed to stand underneath a balcony ?? not right beside the seranadee. I'm not so sure about Nick's talents..at least Josh could weld a lovely rose.

Josh lost his cool at the mariachi date..and told Kaitlyn that noone likes Nick..so Kaitlyn put the question to the group...noone agreed with Josh...what happened next lead to
Nick 1 (rose) Other guys 0 (roses)

and I fell in love with those sombreros and that Sebastian kid who has more self confidence than Ian and Josh put together.

Shawwwwwwn
Shawn gets better and better...they have a cute kayak date. Then they change (where? I always wonder where they change..do they bring clothes..do they go back the hotel? I've never figured that out) and Shawn tell her how he survived a car crash and that everything lead him to this moment and he feels lucky. Awwww..Shawn..you're the best!!! I think I'm falling in love with Shawn...
and he apparently smells good too..because Kaitlyn says she loves his smell. That's awesome.


Cocktail party

Ian has a soliloquy. So many things I learned about Ian...I didn't know he was an ex-model, Princeton grad, has charisma, a good job, an ex-girlfriend hotter than Kaitlyn and a lot of action. It's so impressive when a person tells you how impressive they are. Ian sounds like one insecure dude..and he needed to get his mojo back...and the weak attempt he tried to do was by insulting both Kaitlyn and the sub-standard guys . This Princeton dude ain't not prince...Yeesh. That guy is hurting so badly..maybe he needs to talk to Tony for some spiritual healing.

What does Kaitlyn see in Derek? I don't get it...but she thought enough to bring him back to her room...

I'd date Shawn and send the other guys packing. Oops..maybe we shouldn't say that in Texas...I would send the other guys home. However it appears Kaitlyn takes a likin' to another cowboy and knocks boots with him next week..a situation that is uglier than a mud fence as they say in Texas. Seems like a dumber than dirt decision to make in this stage of the game. Well, you gotta be tough as a boot, quicker than a hiccup and wolverine mean to last in this rodeo.

but until next week...
I LOVE THIS SHOW!!

Nick is no smoke show..

Wow..this wasn't the Bachelorette..It was the Nickorette show.
Holy smokes (pun intended)...why was there much ado about Nick. I mean...maybe some people find him appealing. Can't say he's my type...He seems to be a bit of a one trick pony. He shows up and is a bit cool, yet communicative..that and maybe some girls like guys who seem to re-wear the hoodie and  jacket ensemble. He re-wore that outfit twice in two days. But the suitcase he was wheeling throughout NYC seemed pretty small. Maybe a few more hoodies, some undies and his skinnies..jeans that is..don't take up a lot of space..and clearly the guy does not use hair products.
There was so much talk about Nick, it was a cloud over the show. If someone really likes this guy..please message what I might be missing. I did notice that his response to kissing Kaitlyn was.."it wasn't terrible"..in a dry, sarcastic way. Wow Nick..you are so cool.

But back to original programming and what happened with he original dudes who went on the show..the old fashioned way..not finding Kaitlyn that new-fangled way of social media-but sending in an audition tape and have an interview. Here are the highlights.

Clint..gets a stern talking to fireside with Kaitlyn who toned down the sparkles for this cocktail party..and just donned them around her neck and waist. I thought Kaitlyn was buying was the story Clint was constructing..but boom! (Relationship) building permit denied!!!  Clint the architectural engineer is out! But not before bro JJ tells him to apologize for the negative emotion in the room. what the JJ? Clint is angered. They have many expletive filled exchanges ...the one I didn't get was the one where Clint insulted JJ's tie? Is that a thing? a tie/shirt mismatch insult? I don't get dudes.
Then JJ is crying...then he tells himself to pull it together...then tells 'Merica..that he is looking for a girlfriend..not a boyfriend. Right JJ. That's the premise of this reality show...maybe he needs some remedial help to figure the premise of this show out.

There is no rose ceremony!!
I'm starting to think there is a rose shortage in LA..guys are punted, ceremonies are cancelled.
I say bring back the rose ceremony...

But it's okay, it's all right..because da boys in da bachelor mansion are going to NYC y'all !!!!

NYC

Group date...keepin' it fresh..
The rap show down was kinda like the poem jared wrote for Kaitlyn at the fancy met date. Some rhyming verses.
First...Shawn's abs put the awwwwww in Shawwwwwwn. Whoa..nice abs..did Shawn actually rap??hahaha..he was kinda funny making fun of Justin's hair.
JJ..actually said NYC ho's in his rap. His name should be DD for Ding Dong.

At the after party..this is where Nick gets introduced and proceeds to steal the show.
what kinda flopping turtleneck/short sleeved shirt was Kaitlyn wearing...I wasn't getting it or digging it.
Kaitlyn floated the idea of Nick on the boat with the guys. I think the boat was actually bobbing in the  water...maybe it was the bobbing..but the idea of Nick didn't sit well with the boys...then they beat the Nick subject to death...wow..that was boring. It does seem a bit weird..but as one guy concluded..if she feels this is right for her..go for it..and what will be will be.

Most boring date in bachelorette history - Jared date.
Not sure if Jared packed a tux..but he came in one..it fit him well..and that's all I can say that is positive about Jared..wasn't this guy all 100% Team Brit? Maybe I"m harsh with Jared because is angular jaw distracts me and seems harsh..but he seemed to echo whatever Katilyn said our wanted. The poem was an effort I guess...and one helicopter ride in...he thinks he's falling in love with Kaitlyn..hmmm maybe I need to catch a helicopter ride...or rub a genie..

Speaking of which..
Group date 3: Aladdin and Broadway
the guys audition..Chris the cupcake guy gets the party. He seems a bit milque-toast..or soggy cupcake. Great for enthusiasm..but I didn't sense any chemistry...but he does have some solid abs...and looks good in a headpiece. Their walk onto the stage, I mean their Broadway debut, went off without a hitch...and the 27 seconds was glorious...Chris encouraging her to soak in every minute and be present.Okay Thich Nhat Hanh, thanks for the tips..this Chris guy can do it all...zen mastery, dental work and Broadway. I think he deserves some type of Bachelorette award. But after their stint on the stage..the date is not over!! They go to see the New Years Eve ball..and Chris exclaims they are the centre of the universe. Okay..so Chris ain't no Copernicus..I mean..noone's perfect:)

Is there a rose ceremony?
No.
But in other exciting news..Nick moves in. Yawn...
But even though there is no rose ceremony.
I (STILL) LOVE THIS SHOW!!!!!!!!

So much drama-this episode is for the birds

This is where I think that stereotypes are wrong. This is the most dramatic bachelorette in history..
Kupah is still on this show for not a good time, nor a long time. Kaitlyn has a chat with him when she hears all his yellin' in the courtyard. He is one angry bird. More birds later in the show..
And did he say the word chlamydia?

I thought they did testing prior to the show.

But Kupah is Kaput...she awards roses..and why does she choose Tony to stay? That must be a producer pick.

Most of this episode was much ado about a lot of men chirping and there was some serious preening going on.

Group date: Note..there will be some violence in this date....It's not rated T (for Tony).
Some sumo wrestlers awaken the men from their slumber. The men don some garb..but not a lot..and get a sumo lesson...then proceed to get taken down. Even Tony couldn't locate his inner warrior.
I thought it was funny that guys commented on the lack of Tony's butt.I'm not sure it makes me feel better, but it always seems that women are critiquing other women..so it is a bit refreshing when the tables are turned. It seemed that this sumo event really annoyed Tony after he lost. I lost count how many monologues he had about his warrior spirit, his loving nature, peace and his bonsai trees.  For someone so peaceful he got so very angry..and seemed to direct it at Kaitlyn's choices of dates.  Some people were a bit more comfortable with the event..Joe..just let it all hang out.and Clint just wanted to bulldoze people.
Shawn gets the rose!!

Tony does not go on part two of the date..instead he chooses to leave on his own terms. He puts on a few layer..wow that was an ugly fleece. He met Kaitlyn to let her know...He's gone.thankfully...his monologues were getting so repetitive! Hopefully someone was watering his bonsai trees.

Is there bromance brewing??
With some good editing it seems that Clint and JJ are having a budding bromance. Clint is becoming less attractive.

1:1 Date..house of horrors..
No.not the bachelor mansion..but some studio..Ben and Kaitlyn must make their way through a locked room and get the passcode to exit. Let's say it together.."this date is a good test of a relationship"..blah blah..perhaps pigeons, pests, maggots and the anaconda were metaphor for challenges they would face in the future..it seems more like the metaphor that Kaitlyn faces in the house trying to bumble her way to a happy and gas free exit.
Ben was pretty lovely during the ordeal..very supportive. His 1:1 time with her was lovely...I hope he cries one day:)

Group Date: Learning about love
Interesting name for the date. The only mention of love was from Ben H..who did a stellar job interlacing his task at hand with the bigger picture and included Kaitlyn...good lesson Ben..include the woman and that's all it takes.
Joshua was so funny saying that he learning everything from cows on the farm...
Did Kaitlyn ever tell the guys they were child actors?
Jared gets 1:1 time with Kaitlyn..back in her hotel room..that Jared has one very angular face..like it might hurt to kiss him at the wrong angle..He doesn't seem super masculine..but I vote him as most likely to suit skinny jeans, single origin bean coffee and most likely to go to Coachella .
Ben gets the rose!!

Meanwhile the house villains are back at the house in their loungewear and perfectly coiffed hair squeezing each others back pimples (ewwwww). I'm not sure if they are into each other or into winning...JJ thinks he's a pretty scary dude. Pretty scary that he thinks he's appealing to women.

At the cocktail party...Kaitlyn is going to have a severe talking-to to Clint..i wonder once confronted if he will lose his swagger and chicken out and  eat  some crow or will this be his swan song???
until next week...
I LOVE THIS SHOW!!

Kupah- the par-tay pupah...

First...I was 1/2 hour  late to the Bachelorette, ah! hate missing any part of it...then in the inconclusive  episode...what I did conclude is that this is one juicy season of the Bachelor!

Just sat down to cute Ben accepting the rose.
Apparently it was a boxing date..not sure if Tony was called upon to do any healing.


One on one date: C-AH-YUTE Clint
Wow is he cute.
Clint is cute...
okay...back to the blog..Kaitlyn says she 'vibed' with Clint. I like that Kaitlyn was in the driver's seat and drove Clint. He asks..so are we sky diving? spear fishing? Interestingly, they are diving underwater...for underwater photos! And naturally, Kaitlyn notes that this photo shoot is a "test of our chemistry"..
I think the photographer was a student of Tony's. She gives Kaitlyn and Clint breathing exercises so they can feel the 'inner moment'...(as opposed to the outer moment) and the put each others hands on the partners heart. Tony would have been proud.
What type of make up do you apply for underwater photo shoots? Waterproof mascara...cream shadow..but is there waterproof concealer?
Regardless..they both looked fantastic in the photos...Clint and Kaitlyn feel the spark in the water..and kiss while the photographers are off looking at the shots.  They have dinner..or appear to be in front of food...Clint seems eloquent.
Kaitlyn says Clint brings out the romantic side of her.
Cute Clint gets the rose!

Group Date #2: IMPROVing their chances to win Kaitlyn's hard
This date is at an improv club. Prior to the date card..Tony was pontificating about love..one point that I agree with is that you shouldn't have to fight for attention. So Tony, Toni, Tone..I agree with you on not fighting for attention...but then I almost nodded off with the rest of his musings..love is about being present, discussion, ideas, dreams..it's as perennial as grass. Walt Whitman Tony ain't. Maybe the transcendental part..but not the realist party. I think I'm too left brained to find Tony interesting...I find him mainly annoying..kinda like a guy who talks too much about his ideas on a date.
On to the group date. Highlight of the show..Amy Schuler! Loved that she subtly undercut Chris by saying to Katilyn "Can you imagine driving a tractor right now?"Wow..she's so funny and insightful...I want to be her friend!!!  The guys had to perform for a crowd..and they had some female comic coaches. Loved that Amy noted that JJ was egomaniacal and lacking humility. You probably have to be so observant to be a comic.
Ian's joke about Juan Pablo sweating on the Women Tell All..was pretty funny. The dentist did a good job...(he's one fit dentist).
I couldn't stop my eyes from rolling when Tony took the mic. More philosiphizing (sp?)ensued.
I'm not sure who said this but the guy that said "it's human instinct to protect your awkward sensor"..so funny. so true.
At the after party...the dress was too much. Kaitlyn likes the sparkly but on a dress sparkle + animal print = bad idea.  JJ has some 1:1 time. and spoke to Kaitlyn about having a child. I agree with Kaitlyn, it is endearing when you hear a guy talk about his child/chidren with love..makes you thing they are capable of being selfless. Cotton-eyed Joe from Kentucky takes Kaitlyn from the room and kisses her by the brick wall. Joe surprises me..he doesn't seem like the romancing type. "Well, I'll be:)"

But it's  who JJ gets the rose.

Another  shiny dress at the Cocktail party. Many sequins were harmed in the making of this Bachelorette...some much shimmah!!
JJ takes her aside to tell her how serious he is...he gets on the bad side of the guys...Clint looks amazing..Ian took Kaitlyn aside and told her the adversity he overcame..which is very inspiring...Tony is starting to crack..and telling everyone that she needs to be right for him.
Kupah is getting hot under the collar (was he wearing a vest too?..seemed like he had a lot of layers on)...well he should have cooled off before he talked to Kaitlyn. It seemed like he had theimperession he was kept on the show for broader diversity. He seemed angry..then Kaitlyn turned it back on him..then watching Kupah backpedal...that totally became inauthentic.

Meanwhile JJ was yammering on to the guys about his confidence, meanwhile he had a really bad case of red wine teeth.
Kaitlyn was contemplating Kupah fireside..when she heard him spouting off as well..so she pulls him aside and tells him she is done...He then leaves and starts yelling outside the mansion...Kaitlyn who is about to be interviewed hears this and goes out the mansion..and then..

To be continued...
Agh!! this Bachelorette is throwing me off my schedule worse than 15 hour jet lag..but..
I LOVE THIS SHOW!!!

PS What are the bets on Britt and singer song-writer lasting??

Two women, two night premiere...two hours of time wasted

Okay okay...i know..part of my frustration comes from not having a PVR, an eastern feed and forwarding through commercials...I could have only wasted 1 hour and 15 minutes
 I like living in it is 2005:)

This first episode in a nutshell.
Caitlin and Britt go head to head. No matter how centered (even with healer Tony's help) one is...being chosen by a group of pretty good looking men, on television must wreak havoc on one's ego.
Men file out of limos, carpools or a cupcake...and at first seem to stride toward Brit, but then the second half seem to be into Kaitlyn.
At the cocktail party...most takes are of drunk Ryan being drunk, picking fights with people and wading into the pool in his tightie blackies. Kupah (is that like Cooper but with a K and and 'ah' at the end) calls him 'white boy wasted'. Is that a thing? Is that because Kupah didn't want to say black out drunk. I really must urban dictionary white boy wasted...

Other items of note..the carpool...I bet that car is hard to insure. It was driven by an amateur sex coach. What is that exactly...someone who coaches people who don't have sex for money???

Speaking of money..the law student/stripper...he seems more proud of his stripping than his law degree..giving the girls a show...to which Kaitlyn wrying says "Brit can have him"..that was funny.

So far..i like the welder..and Shawn:)

I wonder if Ian convinces the guys to vote for Kaitlyn..
Until tomorrow..(because I have to see who gets to stay)...
I LOVE THIS SHOW

Go Kaitlyn!!!!

yawwwn....finallly the rose...i mean the final rose

Gotta say..I'm surprised...
I"m going to cut to this really long chase...of Becca..(side bar..Becca reminds of a country music singer..her hair and her cakey yet awesome make-up..and the drawl..totally reminds me of a country music artist or someone who's doing a cameo role on a soap opera). Do you think Becca has veneers..here teeth seem so perfect?

You know..I'm really happy for Becca...she didn't budge.she didn't know, she wasn't sure.
I felt like Chris tried to pry and pressure her to come up with some indication of her feelings.
But she didn't..she held her ground...If she's not sure, she's not sure. Kudos to her for not faking it.
I'm thrilled for her. It's okay not to know.  I kinda liked Becca's wine dress..but it kinds of reminded me of velvet drapes. Hopefully it was warm, because I think the barn was pretty chilly

Side bar: what is falling in love. I'm thinking about that again..it's like the song this made me think of that question of falling in love...are you either in it or not? It's kinda like "I just met you, and this is crazy..so here's my number, call me maybe" Call or not? In love or Not. I don't get it...someone email me the explanation..I'm a bit Becca-esque (with less opaque foundation and my own eyelashes)

Chris picked Whitney.  I spent most of the show rolling my eyes..her enthusiasm and certainty were annoying to me. For example, at their last 1:1 date, she recapped what the day was like in a way like she was telling Chris what the day was like. Maybe it's her nasally voice...so grating..but at the barn proposal..she seemed a bit more genuine. Wasn't a fan of her dress or earrings. I think those earrings are 50% off at Joe Fresh.

I hope  Chris is happy..he said a few times they are perfect for eacother..

After the rose..
the meeting with Becca and Chris was uneventful..Becca was calm and collected...and she looked pretty in her pink dress.

The reunion of Chris and Whitney..was slightly dramatic..he did look happy to see her...Whitney almost had a wardrobe malfunction when she was throwing her arms around Chris...it was barely covering her butt. When they finally sat on the couch she kept bouncing up and down on the couch with Chris. She has a frantic energy...but maybe she's nervous...dunno...must be weird to know there were all these other women involved.

Chis told Chris H..that he told producers he was looking for someone like his sisters...hmmm...
Shout out to Chris' mom...Love her..

yawn..i'm tired..i'm just waiting for the dramatic announcement...

I love the cow..who's name is juan pablo...i think someone should tell Jimmy Kimmel there are only girl cows...

The big announcement - two bachelorettes...they both came out in sparkly dresses..this is going to be a gong show,,but that's one of the reasons why..
I LOVE THIS SHOW

FODs Back at the ranch...i mean Mulia hotel

I love this show so much...maybe because i like ritual. It's the fantasy overnight dates (FOD)..but I heard Chris H refer to is to the romantic over night dates..whatever..it goes like this.
Reunion (woman typically runs toward man..90% of the time woman jumps up and wraps her leg around him...they kiss..they have a day date..an evening dinner where they sit by food..they don't eat..because the date card is coming which means 99% chance they spend the night together...and really who wants to be digest vegetables while on the FOD...might make extra bubbles in the hot tub:)

They are in gorgeous Bali...it seemed warm not super hot..either that or Chris forgot all of his sleeveless or short sleeved shirts.
Chris says he's excited because he wants to know who potentially could be his wife (nice and vague Chris)

FOD #1 : Kaitlyn
Kaitlyn always looks great. Loved her necklace.  Chris wore a dress shirt and shortsThey had a banana feeding date.Monkey's are cute but i'm not sure i'd want them jumping on me..I actually love the way Chris laughs...it's infectious..
hopefully he's not though.it is the FOD night you know.

Dinner time...Kaitlyn talks about her wall...she tells him she's falling in love with him. He says he's falling in love with her? whah??? seriously..i thought that was against bachelor code..the bachelor/bachelorette cannot reveal true feelings till the end.

Turn out Chris says he's falling in love with everyone.
Side bar: What  does falling in love really mean? If you're falling in love..does that mean intense like? Is there any love there? Is it a BS phrase you say when you've already told there person you really like him/her..but you feel compelled to say more because the other person revealed a lot to you.I think it's a BS phrase..i think you're in love or you like someone.
or then again..maybe I shouldn't overanalyse the Bachelor.

Date card: Kaitlyn says yes and oui.  She talks about your feelings..Chris does some reflective listening. "Everything you're saying I hear". Actually he's more of an affirming listener than a reflective listener.Chris says this is big week for them (he also says that to the other two). Chris likes to recycle. Lines.

I liked the bathtub with heart with flowers in it. Adorbs.


FOD #2: Nails on a chalkboard...I mean Whitney
Wow...i find Whitney grating.

Whitney...she's so happy to see Chris. Except..she still mad at her sister.
Chris and Whitney go sailing. She's contentedly lying beside hime..she always flings her legs over him. She tells him how last week's date with him was 99% perfect, but not 100%. She had to explicitly TELL him how perfect they are together..and why her sister is so dour. Well it's because she's an attorney (?) nice stereotype. Then she was responsible for Whitney after her mom was FORCED to work full-time when the dad left. Poor Whitney. She likes to play the double-edged "I'm so hard done by, but I am strong and undependent (which is only my fall back in case the marriage doesn't work out). but Whitney is happy because Chris reassured her...and that's what she wanted...sigh.we can all relax...Whitney got what she wanted. She now feels at peace. Chris asks her to jump into shark infested water..Yes..she responds enthusiastically.

Didn't really like Whitney's dress..i like the mint colour..but I seriously think i could have sewn that dress...They don't eat dinner. Chris gives her the card..says it's an important week for them both...what does Whitney say "check please"


FOD #3 Becca
I think the producers forgot to plan this date. They walked along some irrigation channels and stood in a creek and kissed. Then they went to temple..and had a chat with the town medium. The medium advised they were a good couple, that Becca was hard to control..and they needed to make love..facig west..hmmm..hey town medium..Becca is an east facer:) Maybe he was picking up confusing vibes from Kaitlyn and Whitney.
I like Becca. She seems really calm and collected...either that or she's dim and it takes her a long time to formulate an answer. Optimistic me..thinks she is the former.
Dinner date. No eating. Chris is sweating profusely.  He presents the card
Even though I  like Becca the virginity reveal was such a snore. But she had some outtakes saying she is feeling feelings and she's excited to see what happens.
She finally tells him in the suite. He's surprised..he said he didn't guess that. He made some awkward comment like he wanted to learn more about her. (?)
Did they sleep together. I really couldn't care at this point...I just want the rose ceremony to happen.

Chris drops by a cabana to have an iced tea with Chris. Chris H does his genius interview and even asks about Becca's reveal. Chris says that had a bad conversation. Becca is no sure she wants to move to Arlington. Yay honesty!!  Chris (Bachelor) is conflicted and confused.

Rose Ceremony
Why they have a rose ceremony at a very sacred place. This show seems the opposite to sacred. But maybe in the women's mind's it's sacred and they can dissociate that the dude is sleeping with/spending the night with other women.

Dressed in tradtional garb...they all look they are wearing natural fibres...the girls dresses and both Chris' look like they are wearing absorbent materials. The colours were pretty on all the women. And both Chris' look good in white...they do look like they are about to do a martial art.

Whitney says she's very confident.

Chris is nervous..he calls out Becca. After all the chat about the terrible conversation..I thought for sure Becca was going home...until..he walks back in the temple with her!!!!

Whitney is now not so confident

I haven't felt this much suspense in so many season!! Almost as  much as Brad Womack's second season.

Whitney gets the first rose.
Becca.the second.

Kaitlyn..goes home...
She's very sad. There were a few long minutes of her looking at Chris and looking to the side. Finally the black mini van engine starts ( I find it refreshing that there are not limos in Bali..or at least not on the show.but they still have to find a unnecessarily large vehicle to burn fossil fuels). She gets in..and perhaps most telling she says "this is the most humiliating moment of my life"...and like a good Canadian she fastens her seatbelt.  Safety first...hopefully protection was used throughout this episode...although that can't cushion the emotional blows.

Next week..it's wtf..i mean WTA..(Women Tell All)

Until next week...I LOVE THIS SHOW!!!

2-day extravaganza:

This is a two day extravaganza- what to report on...these were amazing episodes.
First..this season has got to be the season with the worst hotel rooms in Bachelor history.
Night one: Kinda like hometowns
Chris wants to take the girls to Iowa. They stay in Des Moines just 3 short hours away from Arlington. Jade is the lucky girl to get the real hometown date...where they toured his farm and then took the 1 minute tour of downtown Arlington.
Whitney gets the other 1:1 date...Whitney is so eager about everything. EVERYTHING. I like enthusiasm..but hers strikes me as a desperate eagerness. they have a downtown date..they take photos of each other..she was thrilled..later they met his friends..still thrilled...then they have a mural of them ..she was SO THRILLED.
The girls back at the hotel room need out. That was one ugly hotel room, not even the new accent pillows could refresh that tired looking room. The fake plants were awful.
Des Moines looked kinda pretty though
The girls who didn't get a 1:1 took a road trip to Arlington..where some of them were overwhelmed with how underwelmed they were. Like Britt. But Casey ensured she reported that detail to Chris not the skating date.
After the skating date..they went to a coffee shop...where Kaitlyn got the rose..that put Britt into a tizzy..she was slowly starting to unravel..and made it awkward to everyone after the rose was given to Kaitlyn..Britt can't recall that others have been in that position that she was in now.
Casey was so funny that episode..but i'm unconvinced she loves Chris that much..i'm convinced that she is looking to be loved.
Before the rose ceremony everyone is getting worried...Casey and Whitney are especially mad...
Britt gets let go. I think she was sobbing so loudly outside the house like a last ditch effort for Chris to get her to come back
At the rose ceremony Casey get the boot. I wonder if she sees Britt at the airport...

The real hometowns..

Becca - Louisiana
What was with Becca's top? It was like a tank top blouse? What was it all about..i guess it's good if you really want a good shoulder tan.
Becca is awaiting for Chris in a playground that is adjacent to a lake that has alligators (?!). No wonder there aren't any kids in that park. Oh.then they ride down in a canoe by the alligators.
Then they meet Becca's family in a well-appointed home.  How does Becca not pass on any make up tips to her sister. That was a way too smoky eye. Becca's sister took Chris aside to tell him Becca is not an intimate person. And that she doesn't do PDA..just because someone isn't into PDA doesn't mean they are not intimate..and what does "not an intimate person " really supposed to mean?

Take-home from this hometown: BECCA HAS NEVER BEEN IN A SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP BEFORE.


Whitney-Chicago
(warning-I find Whitney annoying..i'll try hard to be a bit more positive)
Whitney is walks with purpose. And she is singularly focused...oops actually she's doubly focused...she really wants to be with Chris. She meets Chris in a park and tells him she is going give him a tour of her life...First off to the clinic..where she is  MESMERIZED with how cute is in scrubs...she gives him the birds and the bees talk..test tube style..then she takes him to the men's room..replete with adult movies and Playboy magazines (wonder if Jade's issue was there)...and she would test his sperm. Guess what ..she was JUST JOSHIN'...oh that Whitney. (pfffttt.marching soldiers comment)
Then they are off to meet her sister, brother in law and her uncle. Another well appointed place with great light fixtures...they are all welcoming. I kinda like Whitney's uncle. Whitney pulls her sister aside to TELL her how into Chris she is and to TELL her that it is ON HER to give her blessing WHEN Chris asks for it. Whitney was doing no listening. Kimberly was not as enthused...i like that she told Chris she'd give her blessing when Whitney was not a 25% chance.
Whitney then took Chris home. I'm not surprised that Whitney has a small yappy dog. Whitney pulls out a bottle of wine that she said she was going to drink with her husband. Her and Chris embrace.

Take home from this hometown: WHITNEY LOVES CHRIS!!!!!!!!!

Kaitlyn - Leduc I mean Phoenix.
Aww..no Alberta visit for Chris. Kaitlyn's family winters in Phoenix.
First they have a rap session.
Her parents and their spouses an her sister are all present..they all get along..Sweet. Not much happens. Except the little detail of the billboard that reveals Kaitlyn hearts Chris. That Kaitlyn has a hard time expressing with words..hopefully the billboard cuts it.
I"m betting her top is from Maison Scotch:)

Take-home from this hometown: Kaitlyn still has a wall-up.

Jade- Omaha
Whoa..I thought that hometowns had home staging done. Nope. Especially not in Jade's case. But outdated coaches and windows coverings are the least of her problems.
She has to have a revealing date.(heh heh)
Chris meets her dad, the dad's fiancee, the brothers and the mom. Chris makes an excellent decision to give the flowers to Jade's mom.
Jade's brothers have nothing notable to say except Jade is a 'wild mustang'. I love how supportive Jade's dad is of her..and then he had a cry. Awww...his quote "don't let someone put you down for who you are".
Chris who was all convinced of her midwest values..his interest is piqued. Since the date was so early, they go back to his really ugly hotel room. Were those brass doorknobs? Jade tells Chris about her Playboy photo shoot and then show him. Chris is nervous. I mean..whaddya say? But he was actually super sweet. Jades leaves the lap top with Chris..and appears to leave his hotel room in her socks..do you have to take your shoes off at the door of this hotel room?

Rose Ceremony
Ugh..Whitney got the rose..she takes the rose and I think she burned some laser focus into his corneas.
Kaitlyn (YAY!)
Becca (OKAY!)

Jade gets the boot. Chris is affected..he even pulls a Mesnick in the hotel.

Next week..the FODs in Bali!!
Until next week - I LOVE THIS SHOW!!!

Clear the deadwood

This Bachelor is turning the beat around..
Leftover Rose Ceremony from last week.
But .ooo.right..Kelsey is having a fake panic attack..it was like a wheezy cry...I thought panic attacks were flushed chest, difficulty breathing..i didn't know they could take this form. Kelsey was writing on the floor and clutching her chest. Whitney's the fertility nurse's medical assessment of the situation..."it's weird". Thanks Nurse Whitney. But she is a fertility nurse...maybe she only specialized in contractions below the navel.
But Kelsey perked up with some CO2 (Chris and some oxygen)
All good.
Samantha (who's that ) and McKenzie go home. Oh.and Ashley was crying out of nervous ness.but she gets the rose!

Beccas' make-up- Becca is heavily made up..but I wonder what foundation she uses...and she must use some heavy duty primer because her makeup always looks perfect...not amazing...but perfect...
Excellent coverage she she is sans pores.

Despite the US economy taking an upturn...the Bachelor is keeping' costs low..and headin' to Deadwood...Deadwood describes who action packed this episode was.

First one on one.Boring Becca with perfect foundation. She has a great date outfit..loved the sweater and shirt..and she rode the horse like a champ. Then then went to a fire and tried to roast some skewered chicken and vegetables that looked like they were leftover from the last camping date. Did Chris even cooks those skewers. Oh.Becca's a virgin..and she finds kissing awkward..on TV because her dad will see. I forgot what Becca's occupation was..not too bright if she doesn't like PDA..that's what one signs up for on this show.

Becca  gets the rose...

Big and Rich
Didn't they break up?  I'm sure I saw that on a  a CMA show..I guess they don't make TMZ much...my main source of pop culture info.
Well - I thought it was going to be a hoe-down..but nope..more like song writing and singing in a bar where they let a few patrons watch. The girls write songs for Chris..Carly was amazing. Britt was cute..Jade worked through her fears.
I'm pretty sure Big was drunk during this...
After the serenading..they sat around..and Chris had a few one on ones where women reassured him they were interested in him. Sell Sell Sell.
Britt -  I wonder if she showered for Deadwood - got whisked away by Chris where she faked being excited for a Big and Rich concert...The other pretty little tumbleweeds sat back at the bar and waited around and got progressively more insecure..Meanwhile Chris presents Britt with a rose on stage..Britt says that she feels everyone in the concert (all 250 of them)..wanted to be her. The..the
Pièce de résistance....Chris and Britt danced (or more like Britt jumped around) to the song Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy. Nope Britt..not everyone wishes they were you at that time.

Britt got the rose..and a whole heap o tension back when Chris returned with her..Then Chris says he wishes he could bring back the positive joy..tough to be positively joyous when you are being rejected...


Two on one
Kelsey and Ashley....they are more the same than opposite..all three are pumped to ride in a helicopter!!!!! (I don't understand helicopter enthusiasm on the show)...To the badlands..and in a nutshell..they all went to a bad place. They get dropped off near a canopied bed..then they get private time by some dusty rocks. Ashely is mean about Kelsey. Kelsey feels self righteous. chris tells Kelsey (what a ding dong) Kelsey confronts Ashley..to noone's surprrise.Ashley loses it...gets sent packing..by that i mean someone (who apparently has no access to hair, makeup or wardrobe)is dispatched to pick up her suitcases..The girls are shocked and saddened..Then Chris breaks the news to Kelsey that she is gonzo..She keeps her chin up..because above everyone is where she is..I like how Kelsey constantly reframes things..first this was going to be her love story..then she ends with saying that this was her attempt at adventure in love. Then the disheveled suitcase fetcher gets her bags..the girls rejoice!!!


But all this drama means no rose ceremony!!
Until next week...I LOVE THIS SHOW!!

Hey Hey Hey - to finding love in Sante Fe

You know..everyone is caring what Chris is thinking.
I think to be a bachelorette, one must suspend any critical thinking (of oneself..they are quick to be critical of others) and worry about what Chris is thinking.
The Bachelor is like a weird prison..you can't leave, you have supervised outings and the warden (Christ) and his helper (Chris H) get to decide when you leave.

The girls head to Sante Fe!! Three cheers..hey hey hey..to finding love in Santa Fe
Which is not a different country - Megan. Yeesh.

Love guru.
The first on one one is with Carlie..the cruise ship singer...she reminds me a bit of a cross between Katie Perry and Amy Poehler. I like Carlie.but Carlie has been wounded in love.
They go meet the love guru..is that really a thing?
Carlie and Chris get suited up in white garb (Carlie's has  draw string) and the love guru makes them  unpant, i men unmask, blind fold and breathe on each other. I felt just as awkward watching this as I do when Ashley I and Chris kiss.
They did bare (not literally) a lot to each other...pretty intense conversation for the Bachelor..she telling Chris she felt unworthy of love and Chris saying he wasn't sure someone would want to live on a  farm. Pretty honest...Gotta give it up to the love guru..maybe the burning sage did something after all.
Then it turned into a typical bachelor date when they went off to a room and sat/lounged by a fireplace surrounded by pillows that was a spot that was conducive to lying down. They remained upright and honest. I like Carlie..too bad she needs to get validation from a dude to feel attractive..it's understandable but hard to hear that someone else's opinion will influence what she thinks of herself.

Carlie gets the rose!

The Rapids date that was the LONGEST DATE EVER
what  snore.
They rode rapids.
Jordan came back at the cocktail party (gasp)..how long is the ride from Colorado to Sante Fe.
Everyone is steaming mad that Jordan is back..it wrecks the cocktail party. They are all wondering What is Chris thinking??
As if seeking re-election - Chris doesn't want to disappoint the masses..so he ejects Jordan..and she's sent packing.i mean..driving (her suitcase was probably still in her trunk)
Fave quote of that date: ashely "my mind is boggled"

Britt -

One of the most fascinating facts of the night was that Britt doesn't shower.  That is the most fascinating question of the evening. I can understand multiples days of not hair washing? But non showering. Is it an aesthetic thing? Does she think it will dry out her skin? Is she big on water conservation? She also sleeps with her make up on. But if she doesn't wash...how would she remove it??
She gets a surprise wake up call. The night before she was crying because her date card said something about being sky high.and she has a huge fear of heights. Chris wakes her up..she rushes around to find clothes..and puts on dirty socks (ewww...but she doesn't wash so it doesn't matter).
How does she look so good without showering. Like really. For someone who was so scared of heights she was ecstatic of a a hot air balloon ride. Last time I checked those go pretty high..and you are flying around in a basket. Well, they have a romantic time.hopefully Chris is upwind of Britt. They kiss. A lot. the hot air balloon attendant must just be focusing on the flame. Not of lot of options for him in the basket.
After the hot air balloon ride..Chris takes her to his room..where they crawl clothed into bed..and 'nap'. Well hot air balloon rides are pretty tiring. Oh they had coffee and snacks too.


Kelsey's story
Kelsey tells Chris she is a widow..and creepily gives a monologue on camera how this is her love story too. Is she lying about being a widow? She seems very intent on having limelight and having this being told in story books. So she's a guidance counsellor. Really?
It seemed weird that she wanted to make out with Chris after she tells him this story.

I think the Bachelor skimped on psychological testing for this batch of contestants.

Cocktail Party

Scratch that. Chris knows what he wants and he announces the conversation he had with Kelsey made him reflect on things. Kelsey (who i'm certain is wearing Stella and Dot earrings) seems very assured that she is not going home..until Chris cancels the rose ceremony. She gets up..and then goes and has a panic attack.

Rose Ceremony

That's right..no ceremony! We need to attend to Kelsey's panic attack...
What happens..I guess we find out next week..
Until then,
I LOVE THIS SHOW.

Every rose has it corn(niess)

Dunno about the demographics of the Bachelor blog..but the tittle is a spin from the every 80s hit by Poison (?) called Every Rose Has Its Thorn...
Yes..i liked bad music then..and umm..i still do..in 2015.
But back to this horrifically stunted yet glorious program whose producers might think that they highlight women's strength by having them run a mudder type race..whilst in wedding dresses and the prize is to spend time with a man.

Sidebar: This is the season of the lashes and accessories..but lashes seem very 2013..it really is all about the eyebrow in 2015 well at least according to my fave youtube make-up artists. Not sure how they get mascara on those lashes without marking the top of the eyelid.

Group date-gonna get  natural (on this very fake reality show) Part 1
Well the girls get all natural for the date. I think Ashely I was so busy with her lashes she forgot to put on the bottom half of her top to make it a crop top.and she forgot to button her shorts. They all get to go to a lake..more bikini time..but this time in a marshy backdrop. Some dis-robing happens. yawn. Nothing new.

Sigh..
But this is what we all signed up for. I've gotta make it quick..
Chris (the host) comes for a visit. Chris is looking like he is working out...maybe him and Jillian are pumping iron between takes. Chris is somewhat newly divorced...likely getting in some good 'me' time...maybe he's meditating..eating more vegetables and laying off the cocktails.he's looked refreshed. He announces to the remaining girls at the house that Chris's sisters will visit

The not-so-evil sisters visit.
Chris' sisters..who all look they've been to a salon for blow outs...come to visit the bachelor mansion to choose someone worthy for a one on one date with their brother. Jillian had taken a break from push-ups to catch some zeds and sun her activated glutes poolside. Someone is kind enough to wake her up for the sisters interview.
Jade gets the golden ticket (it actually was golden..not like the American Idol golden ticket which really is a yellow piece of paper).

Group date: Natural date part 2
After the lake fun..they get to stay the night..in a tent. And they all get to double up and pitch tent. Confused tenting ensues. Chris goes to help. they have a fire and they barbecue skewered meat that they probably picked up at Albertson's on the way..oh and marshmallows. Chris takes the girls on a mini cliff to have some one on one time. When Ashely approaches Chris with her open mouth to kiss hime...it reminds me of this really scary picture of an eel i had in my Bio 20 textbook of this really big mouth wide open. What ensues after  she and Chris connects mouths...it seems like there is vacuum suction there..like she could seriously suction any food item that he inadvertently aspirated.
Ashley S remains psychologically unstable. I"m not sure why the show doesn't get her help. It's not funny. Ashely I's fake eyelashes look even more creepy by firelight.
The girls think Kelsey is fake..she is all smiles around Chris..not good to be fake on the natural date.
Kaitlyn is funny and seems normal..she gets the rose. (that was put in the cooler under the raw skewered chicken..hopefully she doesn't put it near any mucous membrane).
Everyone goes to bed.
The fire is left burning.
Speaking of a burning fire..Ashely i thinks its important she tells Chris she's a virgin..but it's a fail. Chris is not picking up that she has not put out.

Back at the mansion..
Jade gets some real jewels!!! (or ones that are inflated in value due to diamond cartels)
Jade must get ready for her fairy tale date.
So I don't start to develop bad reflux..i have to be light on details.
All the girls are jealous. Jade gets a transformation room. The cool think is she get to keep Neil Lane diamond earrings and Laboutin shoes..i say..that's a score. She picks a blue dress. She gets made up ..i'm guessing not using the organic make up line that she is producing...She is wearing blue eyeliner...i thought you weren't supposed to match your makeup to your clothes..then again her 'fairy godmother' had washed out pink hair. Jade watches the part of the Cinderealla preview.
A car, not a carriage..comes to pick her up. Prince Farming is waiting for her..after he has practised some of his box step moves. He seems a bit stiff and in bit need for some Yin yoga.

They have a date..they dine..I think (did they eat?)..they have no conversation. They were both engaged!! (GASP)..really who cares. It seems like Chris gave her the rose because the sisters picked her.
Chris has one more surprise!! He gets to use his box step after all...they go to another room where  there is an ORCHESTRA!! and they get to dance on a round raised platform...Sidebar..it totally reminded me of the round table that Ivan and I polkaed on..then off of..at Festival '98...Ivan was no prince Farming..but that dude could polka!! (just not on a wobbly table at 3 AM).
Chris and Jade dance..to the sounds of the orchestra and to an excerpt of the movie Cinderella.
But back to the show..
Guess what time it is..Nope..not Hammer Time..but almost midnight..and she has to tell him..Can't touch this..because it's almost midnight. Jade seriously had to run to the car..as the clock was striking midnight...I'm actually betting that it was 10..but they just moved the clock ahead.


Another group date. Group race
In wedding dresses. In mud..to win time with Chris.
Insulting.
Jillian won..and she kissed her biceps at the finish line.
They went on what looked like a beautiful date in San Francisco. In all seriousness the second person who needs a psychological intervention is Jillian. All she talked about was competing and working out. What a snore. I'm guessing the producers cut her commentary about her diet. That  I would have found interesting.  But as my dear friend Di said..noone cares to hear about your workout. It's narcissistic and she identifies with it so much that she has nothing else to talk about.

Chris cut her loose.

Rose ceremony
the big reveal Ashely I is a virgin. Who cares. Then she has a meltdown. She is the 3rd person who needs psychological support.She wears a bad dress again.
so is Becca..but she didn't make it an issue.
Mackenzie looks like she is wearing a cute mint t-shirt but it is really a dress.
Britt asks Chris some questions..to which he has to essentially walk away from. Not cool.
Kaitlyn and Jade look beautiful.

Juliea and Ashley are gone..and so is the girl who wore a blouse and a skirt.

Julia gets a walk out from Chris who reassures her she will be found. Umm okay fortune teller.
But we should all learn from Ashely in her closing words...when a dude doesn't pick you your reaction should be.. I don't care..and go out whistlin'

until next week I (still) LOVE THIS SHOW!!!
.

The Mystery Guest, The "Amazing" Jar and The Farmer

The Mystery Guest, The "Amazing" Jar and The Farmer

Hi, I’m your guest blogger this week - since your regular bachelorette is working the casino!  You know, like Johnny Carson had his guest hosts, or Peter Mansbridge not always hosting the National, like on weekends.  So here we go….

It’s another Monday night in January…no more Monday Night Football (fyi – I’m an ex-bachelor)…but there is a different type of competition… The Bachelor!  Twenty-five players and one prize at the end (or maybe a trophy?!)!

What the…. the first shot is of Chris showering with Jimmy Kimmel?!!? Oh this is just all the previews for tonight’s episode  - it looks like a good one!  Some mystery guy is arriving at the Bachelor compound, he wakes up a snoring Chris; ...here's JIMMY (Kimmel).

Nikki loves Jimmy - she explains to the cameras.  Thank god for the PVR (…sorry Karol) - I need to catch up - there are.... 18 players left; or “Sister Wives” as Jimmy Kimmel likes to call them.  Jimmy introduces the amazing (swear) jar - wonder what they will do with all the cash at the end?!?

Date CARD!

Kaitlin gets her crack at Chris…. they will join an “exclusive club” and high ceilings…. I’m thinking this will be the mile-high club…. what the heck, they pull into the Costco parking lot… I hope they brought their Costco cards, you know members only!

We are really at Costco….oh, Jimmy gave them a shopping list and a Costco card!  Chris thinks the big bottle of Ketchup could “be fun”!  Wow, Chris thinks they have chemistry… now they are in a giant hamster ball!??!  Good thing they have the limo because they bought a lot of ketchup, I mean stuff, including bourbon.  Back at the house, they’re into the bourbon and getting it on - there are some kisses!  I think there really is some chemistry!  …they are still making out….. enter Jimmy!

We find out that Kaitlin dated farmers before! I think Jimmy is ruining this date!  Oh, Kaitlin is the CANADIAN - go girl!!   ….and she is pretty open-minded about the fantasy suite and “test driving” before you buy! Jimmy - and Chris - love Canadians!  Jimmy suggest a threesome - there are a lot of laughs… and Chris is getting the ketchup (he says – I’m not sure what that means, but Chris must have a ketchup fetish)!  Chris thinks the date was “amazing” and gives Kaitlin a rose and a BIG kiss!  Jimmy ends up in the hot tub with Kaitlin and Chris. 

Back at the farm… the amazing jar is getting very full!??!  …and group date  card, for about seven women - I think.  Cut!

Action: Gillian is working out and doing push-ups…. is this the wrong channel?, not that this is a problem.  Gillian announces “I would be scared of me” - I think she is just crazy.

Ok - Group Date is on:  There are twelve women.  Jillian is showing us her muscles and moves.  The competition starts, peel the corn - this is like Survivor - I like the competition!  Jillian’s rear gets blacked out - what is she (not) wearing?  Carly is first to milk the goat and drink it!  Now onto shoveling  crap, then to the pig pen.  While Carly is trying to get into the pen, Jillian “literally” hurdles into it - the producers play it back in slow-mo; it’s impressive and they had to black out her bum again!  But Carly wins in catching the pig: she waits rather than chases the piggies.

Group date cocktail party; Juelia is looking for some Chris time - so sad.  Carly grabs Chris and then does the whole “you are a man, I am a woman” and bam lays a kiss on Chris… good for you girl!  Next up is Amber - dancing … kissing.  Now a girl in white… more kissing.  One of the women is calling out Chris on all his kissing (sorry I can’t keep up….)- I tend to agree with her and some do some of the other women.  Becca has a nice talk with Chris….more kissing?? Oh no, only hugs and Becca says she does not want to kiss so soon. …Here comes the rose; someone impressed Chris….it’s Becca!  Carly is upset that she is “roseless” - add that one to the dictionary!  Oh yeah, more drama coming up!!

Five dateless girls back at the house (plus Kaitlin).  DATE card… Whitney gets it - she cries.  We think her hair is too yellow!

DATE (with Whitney): She has a funny little voice - I couldn't take that voice…. Chris tells her  he wants a girl that can “roll the cob” and “shoot the $&%&#”.  They are way too nice to each other.  They decide to crash a wedding that is down the hill - sure that is not set up at all.  they start walking down the hill… commercial.  Back - now they are in the limo in formal dress and suit, and it is nighttime….hmmm!??!  They decide their story is that they are engaged - they show them “crashing the wedding”.  They dance, meet the family and participate in the bouquet and garter tossing.  They dance some more… of course more kissing.  Chris you are a dirty dog! Whitney thinks this is the “beginning of a lifetime” and Chris thinks she made this date incredible …it was not the date it was her… Chris says he could see her as his wife!!  I don’t know this boy is gonna crash hard…. sooner than later!

In the morning, Chris and Jimmy shower together...the amazing jar is full - I thought the girls had to handover all their earthly belongings….NO cocktail party!…. Pool party instead!!

Juelia gets Chris out of the pool and pours out her heart… she wants to fall in love, since her life was turned upside down. I guess she was married and also had a baby.  her ex had written a suicide note and then her ex was waiving around a gun - she left him; but soon after takes his own life. wow this is heavy.

Next up: Ashley I. - no just talk.  It is some other girl…. she just decides kiss Chris… a lot… Jade thinks she needs time - so she “gets in there”; them are some high white high heels…. looking a little nasty, girl… Where are they? apparently in his room - with no windows...  Good move Jade! then she ends up in bed with him - she is sneaky – guess what? More kissing. 

They walk out and see Jillian in the hot tub.  I think she have had a few too many wobbly pops… Ashley I. joins them in the hot tub and also some other girls - they get kicked out.  They go to the corner and plot their next move.  Megan says she needs some one-on-one time.  Chris is back to sucking face with  Jillian.  Now the three girls are back!  it’s very awkward in the tub.  Jillian is hogging Chris.  Ashley runs away and throws her drink glass down… good thing they gave them plastic.

Back inside, Ashley grabs Chris, they go to an outside patio.  She has a meltdown - she is half laughing half crying (weird!) - Chris apologizes…. guess what next… more kissing.  I hope she doesn't fall off the patio!  I think Chris must have broken the record for most make-out sessions in one episode… never underestimate a farmer!

Back to the communal couch - Chris Harrison shows up and says there is a rose ceremony tonight.  Chris gets a pep talk from Jimmy Kimmel before the rose ceremony.  Chris thinks he had an amazing… hmm, incredible week.  Here we go, the roses are getting handed out: Jade, Samantha, Juelia, Mackenzie, Chelsea, Britt, Megan (…nice dress), Carly (see you still got one), Ashley S., Nikki, Jillian…… Ladies, (enter Jimmy K.) this is the final rose…. Ashley I.!  Going home are: Amber, Trina, Tracy …and then there are fifteen!

She thinks my tractor is sexy

I tuned it after a few minutes late. That is not the way I like to start Bachelor watching..but c'est la vie. I see women in bikinis in shiny red tractors. Yup. I got the right show. Although I didn't get the  backstory - but guessing the 'winner' gets time with Chris. The tractors are slow. Chris comments that they start off like snails and then he makes a honking sound. Whuh? I'm starting to doubt Chris' intelligence.
Ashely, the free lance journalist who looks amazing in a white bikini "wins". The prize is some one on one time with Chris sitting on his lap - drinking champagne of course.
Why is Chris wearing a hoodie without a t-shirt underneath?
The other girls are sitting around surrounded by hay bales looking Frozen and talking about Chris. Seriously, these girls just need to Let it Go.
Chris comes back..and asks to spend the rest of the date with Mackenzie.
Is Ashley seriously a freelance journalist? How does she not know to say gypped on the show? How do the producers not edit that?
Mackenzie..talks to Chris notices he has had his ears (did he get both of them done?) about big noses and aliens.Nice to know Chris doesn't release based on belief in aliens… Chris..you're a better person than I.
Mackenzie also tells Chris about her son Kale (Umm rutabaga is the new kale..kale is very 2014). Very sweet that he embraces vegetables children.
They end off their date with dancing in a corner..and he kisses her 5  6 times (according to Mackenzie)

Date card!
Megan the make-up artist. gets the card.
Coming off watching the Golden Globes and brand new youtube videos by my favourite make-up artists Kara Kendall, Tati , Sonia Gasparian and Desi Perkins (ok I follow too many make up people on Youtube), but I"m underwelmed by Megan's make up artistry. And I know (from Youtube) you can pull off stellar dupes with drugstore brands so what's Megan's excuse??
pardon me..i get a little passionate about make up..but back to true love..Megan got a date…they went to an airport!!!! and then on a helicopter!!! The views were great..but she seemed so taken with the Grand Canyon that she face planted in his stomach..like she was projecting her visceral reaction. So weird.
The hopped off the helicopter and had a picnic. The setting was gorgeous. Megan tells Chris about her dad dying..and that her mom told her to follow her heart. She also told Chris that she is not here for the wrong reasons…nuh-uh….only the right reasons. Atta girl.
I actually don't agree with Chris saying  Megan has the best blue eyes in North America..my nephew does…sans any make-up product. Case on best blue eyes in North America closed.
Chris is smitten with Megan…i don't' get it..and I don't get why she sporadically whispers to Chris.
She gets the rose!

Ooo..whoa ..heavy topics on this bachelor..Juelia tells the girls that she is a widow. The girls are compassionate and ask questions..even after Juelia tells them her husband committed suicide.  I thought they were very supportive…but asked the useless question if she had noticed any signs..i'm not sure how that question is helpful.
But how are the girls so supportive of that but not when Ashley clearly is having some type of issue with reality on the zombie date? I thought they lacked compassion and insight…it was like a group, mean girl bully mentality. That was sad to watch.

That whole Zombie date was hard to watch. The squealing girls in the limo..super annoying. I don't get the preoccupation with zombies…i thought the guy i dated in 2011 (briefly) who talked about zombies was an anomaly. But so many people are interested…I don't get it…Still doesn't want to make me get back together with the zombie loving DJ. But back to true love…Britt gets a card that says free kiss from Chris. She's thrilled. I hope noone tells her that Chris hasn't been charging for kisses.  Kaitlyn gets the rose!

I have to say..what endeared me to Chris is how he treated Ashley. He didn't call her 'cray'. He actually gives people a chance and accepts them as they are.

Jordan's upside down tweaking whilst drunk seemed like perfect example of why they should keep helmets at the Bachelorette mansion.

Cocktail party
I will say one thing is cray. Ashley's outfit. and there is another..Ashley's overzealous make out with Chris. Yikes. Both are TOO MUCH.
Jordan was drunk.
I think Whitney's voice got higher pitched than last week.
TaraThe cowgirl was sad.
Britt was emotional.
Katherine was back!! (whuh? she came back?)
Not much else..oh..the bartender asked to kiss Chris. Seriously? - but she secured a rose.
Jillian wiped out enroute to get a rose that wasn't hers. but she got one later…
Ashley got a rose..
Did anyone notice the sunflowers behind Chris when he was awarding roses…he likes to keep it as country as he can.
and a bunch of other girls got roses…

Tara had the saddest swan song…it went on for many verses…so much sadness for her. Yikes Tara…you gotta love yourself first…then it doesn't matter if a farmer from Iowa whose dress pants are too short doesn't pick you.

Oh..quick note..no rose report next week…this bachelorette is working a casino…oh..i mean working at a casino…not "working a casino"… I'll be up even later then when I write this report..but what do I love….. you guessed it..
I LOVE THIS SHOW!!
see you in two weeks!!

The amazingly long journey

I gotta make this Rose Report short because this was one really long episode. And there were also a lot of long lashes
But when I saw 1/2 hour is dedicated to red carpet ceremony of Bachelor Nation - my first thought that this episode would be like the tepid Canadian Bachelor …insufficient content so it depends on filler and short episodes..but nooooo…this was a 3 hour episode . Yes some people in the developed world still don't have PVRs.
Bachelor nation…it rings hollow. It's like the Bachelor franchise is trying to build a history, a family. But looking at former Bachelor/Bachelorettes hanging on the red carpet awkwardly. Kinda like flying solo at a wedding..where you only know the couple and you have awkward conversations with people you think are awkward.
Speaking of, the extended conversation that Chris had with Nikki about her non-relationship with Juan Pablo..was about  7 minutes too long. That was mucho ado about nada.

Andi looked so lovely. Josh is looking fine..i think his tooth whitening went from electric white to white ivory.. nice to see he toned it down. I'm concerned for his enamel. Andi looked better than ever. I'm not sure why she kept stroking Josh's back..but with an open hand..it was like open handed stroking. She continued that in studio when they were called upon in the town hall to discuss Bachelor Chris' decisions. She just can't let go of Josh.

I like Chris (well the host definitely..but Bachelor Chris..yes)..but the Iowa montage..was way too long..I think they covered every inch of his 6000 acres that Chris is covered in corn, soy and alfalfa. Bottome line..Chris wants a wife.and they are moving to Arlington (pop'n 400). The episode was sprinkled with many kernels :) of wisdom and farming metaphors. The Bachelor is anything but subtle.
Yup….love i a lot like farming…you plant a seed..and nuture it and you get something people. But ah..really for something beautiful to flower..the soil (and we all) need to go through a little bit of sh!t.

Stop the car(s) Stop the car(s)!!!!
Somebody please stop those cars.
30 women. Yeesh. That's 8 % of the population of Arlington.
Britt was the first out of the limo and had a hug that just wouldn't quit. But it worked..and she's adorable. I think I wanted to find her annoying..but I really liked her (and so did the Iowa home slices that were in the Bachelor nation audience). She gets first impression rose~
Jillian.whoa is she buff..did you see her do pull-ups with a weighted belt (that's pretty bad a$$ )
Reagan with a fake bloody heart…eek
Mackenzie…I think she got her dress at the Sposabella close out sale..but she made it.
Ashely..of the people are onions and you need to peel them…She seemed odd..and not because she can't explain metaphor…but the pomegranate picking was odd. I didn't know if she was drunk or off.
Tara..speaking of drunk..i thought she was going to fall over at the Rose Ceremony..but he picked her…I kinda admire Chris for that…because she was a drunk mess.
Kaitlyn. Whoa. Hold the horses…even though I know she wants her field plowed. And what about that Tupperware joke…Eek.
Carly the cruise ship singer with a karaoke machine…I think she got the machine and her dress at Toys r Us…not understanding Chris' taste.
Amanda the ballet dancer looks like a belly dancer. I think her mom bedazzled her top for the show…but they were not good luck charms.
Jade..I'm pumped she's on..because I can't wait to see her make up choices as a cosmetics developer..she looked pretty..and not like she was off to a debutante ball.
Who wore the dress that looked like a table cloth. It seriously looked like she fashioned that from some doilies that she found in someone's closet..and it was complete with doily cuffs. You can't make this stuff up.
I can't remember the rest of the women..except  Kara the soccer coach who said she wanted to "get wit" Chris..and was "just a servant"..to who.
And the big teaser is..Kimberely the yoga teacher goes back into the house..and wants to talk to Chris..will she get to stay. Yikes. Never beg. It's so unbecoming..and soon you'll be going.

The sneak peak for future episodes…looks like there is going to be drama, romantic dates (yes..there will be a private concert!) and tears along the way…it will be fertile ground that will yield true love.

until next week..I LOVE THIS SHOW!!