Danke Schoen

Before I get into the RR, I'd like to say thank-you very much to the Bachelor(ette)for providing me with a reason to look forward to Mondays:).

Ominous Spiritus and Vegas (baby)

I'm not sure which part of pop culture I missed...but where did "Vegas baby" as a saying come from?
They are all of to Vegas..Many sequins were harmed in producing outfits for Becca, as she tries desperately to reflect (lol) what she wears to the environment..if I were to match my outfit to my work environment-it's be super beige with a bit of taupe through in for contrast:)

There were some strange animals coming out in Vegas..I blame it on the fact that they stayed at the ARIA hotel. I think that sends some bad vibes. And there were all kinds of tension and bad vibes. Well....that and I don't think Vegas is a city of excellent decisions.

The men/boys arrived and Becca was - surprise- in their hotel room/compound which had a pool table and weights...so really the guys never had to leave. This show really does imprison them for awhile and remove freedoms and privileges to them. The men ran around their large room very enthusiastically and appreciatively. And then Becca said "let's take a gamble on love" and then she left the room in

The first 1:1 date was hot and random

Colton and Becca got to ride camels! Whah? They tried to hold hands but Becca's camel was ahead...too bad that romance opportunity on humpback was denied. They road in the hot ARId desert until they reached the...hot tub!
Nothing like cooling  dusting off with a dip int the hot tub. There Becca feels comfortable with him to straddle him in the hot tub.
Becca changes into another shiny number. Then they don't have dinner, they make out at the dinner  and Becca gives him a rose. And Colton is falling in love with Becca.


Group date
The only reason I'm excited is that I get to see Leo. I wonder what he says to Becca to make her keep him. He seems to be reasonable and level.
This date is a bit of a repeat of the Richard Marx date with a guy I know less about..Wayne Newton. Wayne is sporting a really deep tan and a really white smile. He shows the guys around his compound  and they are to write a song for Becca to the tune of Danke Schoen-which he sings lovingly? to this wife. I ain't no Pitch Perfect I or 2 but I think his singing is off.
The guys later perform horribly-even Chris did although the guys thought he had swagger.
At the afterparty..in an arena..which to me seems like it would be a very cold afterparty...they call got Time with Becca (typically in the seats) except Chris didn't since he thought he performed the best. Chris took a gamble with that move. Blake ain't no fool-he is falling so hard for Becca. He awkwardly suctions her lips when he kisses her.

Blake gets the rose
2:1
Jordan and David- two biblical names of men who epically dislike each other.
Becca fails at matching her surroundings.she is wearing camo in the desert where there is little vegetation.

They take a bouncy Jeep ride to the middle of nowhere. The bouncy ride foreshadows the upcoming tumult. Both men unwisely insult each other to Becca. And they committed a major sin- they don't fawn over Becca. So this date wasn't really a date...the two were pitted against each other..and let their egos get in the way. Is it me or is David's nose crooked now..but other than that he looks like he's healing nicely...physically.but hopefully emotionally too because he doesn't get a rose! And Jordan and Becca gotta bounce. No literally they bounce there way out of there with the jeep with a compromised suspension system. Not sure who's coming for David.

Jordan and Becca go for dinner. I for one was really interested in his skin care regimen..but Becca didn't hear any compliments or questions. Jordan talked about modelling. I really don't think he's into Becca at all. So Becca and I both saw that he gets sent packing.

Because it's 2018 there is no longer a suitcase guy...but a suitcase girl.
Somehow I think Jordan had more than 1 piece of luggage.

Cocktail party.
Becca is creating drama with Chris. She's not sure if he's 1000% sure he wants to pursue her so she's miffed. Chris talks to her..then goes back to think some more..and needs to talk to her again.
He does some Wills Interruptus...and Will gives him 2 minutes of time. Why does Wills always put a foot on the table.So rude. And I think his move is "I'll not look like I'm into her, but I'm into her, and she'll know I'm into her..". I loved his suit that looked like upholstery. He looks so fantastic. After Chris' 2 minutes were up Wills came back and they essentially had a staring contest. I think Chris thought he could stare down Wills and will him to give him more time with Becca. If I was a gambling woman, I'd bet on Wills. Wills won- Chris had to get up:) and Will sat back down and put his foot up on the table again. sigh. All I heard Leo talk to Becca about was asking her what type of workout she does.

Rose ceremony
I"m not sure how far Leo is going..but I don't want him to go until he gets some air time...
It was John the software guy who didn't get the rose. Phew Chris got one...he sure learned his lesson..he can't take Becca's time for granted.

Next week....the city of lovers..Richmond Virginia? Whah?

Did someone gamble and lose the budget money for the next episode.
Until next week...
I LOVE THIS SHOW!!

Straight to Rose

I'm soooo tired. Two rose ceremonies....and David returns from the ICU...that's exhausting.

I"m trying to write this report..and what..is...this "The Proposal"....I don't get this show....all I see is women getting announced and the women are precariously walking down the stairs..in heels..

Whoa so much love and disaster in one night.

After rose ceremony #1..they're going to UTAH!!

The men are super happy to get out of the house..

Garret gets the first date...they go bobsledding with 

Garrett- this guy's enthusiasm is off-putting..is he really that excited about things? He loves chamagne..he's on cloud 10

They go bobsledding....with a couple of female bobsledders who were in the Olympics 06 and then got married.

They have a little alone time n front of food, he shares that he was married. Becca is momentarily freaked out..but then she's okay and has a romantic dance, I mean backwards sway with him. That seems to be her favourite dance position. I think Becca likes to maximize her body surface area touching her date.

Biggest group date ever.(13!)

Another couple who met on the job. A couple lumberjack and lumber jill. There will be some games and competition..you know...the usual.

Leo KILLED it as usual. Why doesn't he get more air time.

John someone scaled a the big log. That surprised me. He seems like the kinda guy that would solve all my computer and IT problems..but apparently he's got some physicality.

At the cocktail party Jean gave Becca  a Miss Dior perfume bottle over which he covered the name with a well designed label that fit perfectly over it (maybe John helped him with that computer issue:) An he labelled it Becca Blanc even though he then told her he knew she'd like to keep her name (SO ANNOYING WHEN PEOPLE DON"T LISTEN). Then he dropped the L word (nope not the bobsledding couple orientation) but the LOVE word..he told Becca he loved her...and Becca wasn't feeling it..she sent him home..walked him out..then he asks about the perfume..I think he wanted it back...that Dior perfume ain't cheap. You know what is cheap? Talk!! He then retracted what he said about the love part.

Oh and Jordan put on his gold underpants.

No rose was awarded..Becca is distraught.

1:1

Wills. I like that he had his name on his sweatshirt. 

Becca was feeling off..you know ..I was feeling off too...I had a less than stellar date a few days ago...put me off for about 24 hours....but it's all good.

Wills seemed very unaccustomed to the snow...he couldn't seem to walk on it..and he didn't bring gloves on the date..I'm not sure why they would put him on a snowmobile..But off they went..then they had a hilltop picnic..which really means just champagne.

Then they go off to dinner. Wills looks FINE!! Even with his suede booties. but he didn't pull our her chair.

Wills shares that his gf wanted a hallpass. So then he broke up with her. Good job Wills.

Wills seems really calm..and has beautiful eyes. I'm on Team Wills (Can I get a Wills hoodie for that?)

They walk out of the 'restaurant'...what were they going to do next? I was betting fireworks?? Nope..but they did create some of their own when they made out against a rock fence.

He gets the rose.

Chris walks into the room full of guys...and says Becca knows what she wants..so no rose ceremony tonight..and that they are going 'straight to rose'. I think we have a new cliche.

So straight to rose it is..

Kristian..and Nick the lawyer didn't get the rose..

But Jordan did?! I don't get that...but you know who did? LEO! I'm hoping he gets more airtime..or maybe I want to see more of him because he didn't say much..so I assume he's smarter.

Sorry for the short report...maybe I'm still a bit off.

Until next week..

I STILL LOVE THIS SHOW!!!

Blame it on the rain

You know it's not going to be a good day a the mansion when it starts off with a pathetic fallacy...it's raining..not men at the mansion but a series of unfortunate events.

(Budget) Spa date:
I'm not sure how they budget for this show, but some dates have way more of a budget than others.The group spa date, replete with Becca's 'friends' - former bachelorettes are at a 'spa' to help her sort out who will be a good match for her. Becca greets the guys in a white robe and spa slides that look like $1 Walmart slip ons (that I might have bought one year:). The funniest was that everyone was wearing them, it was a great equalizer.
For most of the spa date, I was confused about what happened between Tia and Colton. They both had odd, sheepish grins. I really didn't think anything happened between those two, but it all seemed drawn out. What I found most odd was the 'spa' experience. The women soaked their feet in buckets, did that spa not have foot baths? Between the matching footwear and the foot bucket washing, it seemed like a Soviet style spa experiences.
Jordan massaged Becca's feet and just for funsies- the girls applied nailpolish on the guys. There was no interrogative questions...except for Becca having an conversation with Tia with it ending that Becca loved Tia.

After that , the guys hang with Becca. Jordan says he's a golden retriever in the relationship and Becca keeps a straight face when Jordan says it is hard dating someone with him being a model.
Lol 4000 swipes:) I"m not even sure Becca likes Jordan. Has she kissed him? I don't think so..and she's into kissing everyone...she's test driving everyone..and I think she's like Arie and is a female kissing bandit.

Dave and Jordan swipe jabs. Jordan says God is on his side and ominously says there is some bad karma coming Dave's way. Jordan says that attached to his name is professionality. Is that like Professional + Personality but combined? Reminds me of a nail salon I went to before a friend's wedding that was called Professionail (no N was wasted in building that salon's name...come to think of it, it was way more luxe than Becca's spa day)

Colton says he's her for Becca...aaaand..that' all it takes for her to give him the rose.

1:1 date
Chris kinda reminds me of Ben Stiller...not Zoolander..more something about Mary.
I wouldn't have picked him for a 1:1. He seems full of trepidation. But guess who broke down those walls? Becca?? No "You should have known better" lol...but RICHARD MARX.
I haven't seen that guy since he had hair like Leo.
He's been right here waiting for another appearance.
The date happens at Capitol records where they will write a song for each other..and Richard says" just write what you think and how you feel"...yeah yeah..psychologists say that all the time..easier said than done.
Becca busted a little rhyme.
Chris meanwhile busted his ass, dealt with childhood trauma, whilst sitting on the floor at Capitol records and birthed some verses. Nice job Chris.

BREAKING NEWS....that date was interrupted by a historic handshake between Donald Trump and Kim Jong Un...kinda like the Bachelorette...it seemed fabricated and staged in a mansion like background. They shook hands and I think they're in a relationship..

Phew.the show continued..(and maybe Korea will get rid of it's nuclear weapons)...two very important items.

The two sat down to dinner, did not eat, Chris shared. Becca likes that..because she likes honesty and openness...(b/c in case you weren't aware she was blindsided and lied to).

Chris gets the rose for vulnerability (When you go all Brene Brown vulnerable.you really get the prize).

I'm on team vulnerable. I like Chris.

Date's not over...guess who hasn't left..Richard..he's right there waiting again..and he sings "Right here waiting". We got it Richard..you ain't going nowhere. Except for you hair...that shizzle got lopped off in '91 I think.

There was an incident..Dave the chicken fell out of bed and smashed his face. Is this bad karma? Is it because chickens don't fly. An ambulance came to the mansion and took Dave away..and he broke his face and is in ICU..he was well enough to talk to Becca and told her he couldn't wait to see her.

Group date: Ready to Bumble Rumble!!!! Actually tackle....it's hard to keep dating and sporting

There are some female footballers (American) who put the group date guys through some drills. I"m not sure if they always practice in crop tops and hoop earrings (sigh).
After some drills..guess what? there will be a game for Becca. The Becca Bowl. I think they should have called it the Becca Rosebowl..but noone asked me.

The game ended in a tie..Clay smashed his wrist . Another ambulance..I tell ya.this episode has a lot of injuries...

There is a cocktail party. Blake is starting to unravel because he's not getting time with her. Becca is kissing everyone she talks to. Clay comes back from Emergency...He gets the rose (affixed to he arm sling).

Rose Ceremony time
Becca is wearing a dress that looks like it was on an episode in the early 2000s. Kudos to her for managing to get into and having the mic pack on her butt.

I forgot the guys name who grabbed her and wanted to show her that his skill was in baseball, but then he makes here hit a ball and run on the watered down mansion driveway in heels and a tight dress. I'd be annoyed.but she did it like a boss.

Clay meanwhile is sharing that his wrist needs surgery and that he might need to bounce from the mansion because of his NFL career.

So he takes her aside and tells her..she kinda cries. I think Clay made a good decision. and she walks him out..and watches him walk down the driveway. I"m not sure why because I think all his clothes are upstairs and he needs to pack. The guy injures his wrist and risks his career and there's not black limo to take him. Yeesh..some belt tightening at the mansion...maybe to pay for all these medical bills..medical care is not cheap in the USA.

We have Becca left on the driveway pondering...and no rose ceremony.

I knew the rain was predicting an unlucky episode...

Until next week's rose ceremony....I LOVE THIS SHOW!!!!!!

Tick tock let's make it rock

Might be the best quote ever to come out of bachelor nation.
I'm not sure what it means...
I'm not sure what Jordan meant by it.
Speaking of vague...
Chris Harrison's advice to the whole group of guys for the first day at the mansion
"Take advantage of your time with Becca".

Group date: Groomsday (Like Bloomsday? Doomsday? Was it supposed to by a pun?)
Becca is in a white dress again.
The men do an obstacle course in tuxes. Bryan and Rachel are there to commentate. Is that a word? Like orientate? Conversate?
The obstacle course starts...
And is  Becca keeps shouting "I want that ring". I cringe every time she says it.
Lincoln kinda cheats to get out of the ice cold water. Erstwhile, Clay uses all of his post NFL practice ice baths to protect his jewels from at the room temp. Lincoln wins...because he keeps hearing the word WIN in his head. Not that this  is a competition. But it is.

At the after party..most dramatic part is that the photo is thrown over the balcony and into the pool.
Becca. That gets Lincoln so mad that he has to tell Becca his heart and the photo are broken.  Now Connor is in deep doo doo and might not get the chance to say I do with Becca. Becca is upset...there's drama! There are still another 20 guys to choose from. She can't talk to Connor yet. She likes to give guys time out to "think about it". I think someone should talk to Connor about his shirt. It looked way too small. He left it untucked..maybe b/c there was no remnant of it to tuck.

Jordan gives Becca great advice...to put your confidence on before your socks. Lincoln is wearing another sweater with features..his sweater on the date..was like cargo shorts but on a sweater..so many pockets.and then he had patches. His compliments that he gives Becca/the camera are too much- makes my blood sugar rise just listening to him.

The only good thing about Lincolns patchy sweater is that it looked like it was warm? Were they in a breezeway? It looked so cold.
Why does Becca always sit on her leg when she sits on a couch?

Jean Blanc (cologne guy!) got the rose.

Turn Down for What?
Best part of this date was Lil Jon.  Lame-ish date. I like Blake I think. But during that date I was contemplating if I felt like getting off the couch to wash some strawberries to eat. (I did)
They broke stuff. So Becca could ...wait for it....get over her ex and move on...yawwwwwn....like if she's not over Ari..she should pack up her sequins and go home.

The breaking stuff looked fun.
The dinner seemed nice.. a wee boring. I thought Blake's shirt with pearlized buttons seemed a bit informal for the Warwick.
After dinner she grabbed him and kissed him.

Oh and Blake got the rose.

Group date: Dodgeball
YEAH!!! Leo was out there dodging and representing!! Leo dropped some advice "Winning comes from your heart..not from bicep curls". So happy he got some air time.
His team lost. Both teams went the afterparty. At least Leo sat with her..she said he seems like a romantic..he kinda looks like a guy that might be on the cover of an old school romance novel.

Wills had an awesome jacket and loves his parents. xo Will. Speaking of x he went from talking about his parent's 50th to full on passionate kiss.

What Colton couldn't dodge is a conversation with Becca about Tia. It sounds like they had a solid weekend together. Becca gave Colton a time out b/c she needed to think.

Rose ceremony
She still can't talk to Colton. Jordan takes his clothes off..except for his shoes and aubergine briefs.
The guys don't the opposite word for genuine. It's not ingenuity. It might be disingenuous.
Clay actually stops being so serious and does a post game dance/kiss with her. That was cute. I'm still not sure those 2 have chemistry. I"m nervous Leo doesn't get more time. Dave the chicken/finance guy tries to confront Jordan..but Dave does not a good grasp of rhetoric. He even accused Jordan of foul play and neither thought of the play on fowl play between Jordan and the chicken guy:)
My fave comment of the cocktail party was when Jordan walked through and some guy said "Jeez, I just saw the wrong thing". hahahahahaha

All I wanted from this rose ceremony is for Leo to stay one more week..and to see if Becca decides if she'll date a guy her close friend 'dated'.  I'd love to hear what others thing.

Well.. they both stayed!!!!
(even Jordan..I'm not sure why he is)
Who's the blonde guy with a man bun..I think I like him..and one of the guys that never made it on the date.

Oh! and Alex the construction guy..cried after he didn't get picked...I felt awful for him..hope the guys on the construction site aren't too mean to him..

Until next week

Tick tock, let's make it rock and I LOVE THIS SHOW!!!!