Bachelor Finale- The Sweater I mean Switzerland edition

For whom the bell tolls: The show starts with bells ringing in Zermatt. Someone's love will be sacrified here..in order for there to someone else's love to be requited.

Why Switzerland? Was all the blackness swirling around Courtney require the neutrality of Switzerland to play this out?

Catch this..there are four official languges in Switzerland...German, Italian, French and the last is Rumantch (sometimes called Romansh, Romansch Rhaeto-Romanic..or you guessed it ..Romance.'nuff said)

The finale's promotion promises...The most controversial season ever!!!

Here we go.

Ben, Barbra and Julia
Barbara and Julia are flown in from Sonoma for the final two meet and greet. Barbara and Julia have the warmth and presence of Martha Stewart. Barbara grills the girls seated in the parlour while Julia prefers a stand up interview on the balcony.

Was it cold in the Swiss condo..Ben, mom and Julia all seem to keep their sweaters on. Ben had a weird sweater jacket..and mom looked like she had a matching sweater. Julia looks a little bit like Jennifer Anniston in the face, but she wore this tremendous cape like jacket..Are capes in this year...well...more on capes later

Lindzi's visit.
Speaking of illfitting..Lindzi looked like she borrowed someone's coat..lotsa buttons, big collar and it was belted. It definitely added bulk. She did wear a fantastic watch thought.

For all the seriousness that Barbara and Julia portray they didn't seem to ask very many hard hitting questions. The biggest question was 'what is your secret ingredient'to keep you two together. You know what they overkill on this show...the metaphor. Whaddya say..umm..he's my leavening agent...he's like my baking soda to my apple sauce..we need eachother to support eachother to rise above adversity. 'kay she did say that ..and maybe I just happened to look up what the role of baking soda is as a leaving agent.

The total unnecessary part of the interview was asking Lindzi about Courtney. i thought that Lindzi handled that with grace, and wasn't too mean.

Bottom line:Julia and Barbara say she would fit into the family.

After Lindzi left..mom and sister think the model might not be a good fit.

Courtney!
Courtney arrives for the family interview.. Ben greets her outside and he's nervous. She promises she'll be on her best behaviour...that sounds sincere.
The Flanjak family are wearing their sweaters and scarves..and Julia even donned a sweater cap for a period of time. They don't have central heating in Zermatt?? Maybe the fireplace the room was for aesthetics.

Very few questions were asked...when Courtney answered, she seemed to look up and avoid eye contact...i think that's a sign on lying..well according to Blink by Malcom Gladwell, but hey..this is the journey to true love. Maybe this is an Outlier.
They asked her about the other girls!! Really? EVERYONE needs to let that go.

Well..maybe the family obviously shares Ben's genetic sequence and Courtney's fakeness, sees to elude them and they also conclude that she would fit into the family.

Last ditch dates...

Lindzi- Lindzi's bullet necklace was juxtaposed against the peaceful background. Perhap not so originally, Ben organizes a horse drawn carriage ride. I wasn't sure if Lindzi was going to save teh carriage and ride the horse..but she chose the carriage...they go for a spin 'round Zermatt..then Ben takes on a gondola and they dine suspened in the air..and Lindzi opens up...then...Ben takes her skiing for the first time. Guess what??? A metaphor unfolds. Lindzi says she she can trust him on the slopes and in life. Does that mean it's all downhill from here? And she is taking a risk (skiing) and in love. All I say for both...wear a helmet:)

Courtney..

The most romantic ride in the Bachelor has been supplanted. Limos are so 2008... in 2012 it's the helicopter. Well Courtney gets a helicopter ride..and they have a picnic mountaintop. Did anyone find that they said Matterhorn a lot. Did Swiss tourism pay them to say it a certain number of times? The other odd thing was teh BBQ. What was that..it looked Ikea-esque with an holes punched in an aluminum pan. It also seemed to smoke alot. What was Ben cooking? Then they slid downhill (that was not a metaphor people..that was foreshadowing:)

Courtney gave Ben a heartfelt gift..he didn't seem to appreciate it. But maybe he's taken an oath of secrecy...definitely not celibacy.

D-Day (Decision Day)
Some things never change. The decision day reflection montages..waking up, staring out the window, drinking a hot beverage and looking thoughtful.
Neil Lane arrives..with his suitcase of diamonds..he introduces himself to Ben (again)..i think he did that so everyone hears his name. Then Ben says..we've met. When they sit down he very thoughtfully tells Ben. This isn't your first rodeo.
I know Neil is try to hock his wares..but his platitudes and cliches about love and commitment ring :) hollow. "This is such a big day, every girl wants to be a princess. Please Neil Stop.


It's decistion time!! Ben gets dressed and puts on very casual looking shoes. The helicopters deliver each girl to a mountaintop..and all I can I think is...heels are not made for mountaintops.

What was with the capes and the ugly black dresses?
Lindzi..what was that outfit..it was like Black Swan met the Hogwarts. Was the cape for warmth, drama, metaphorical protection. Well she ditched the cape...Chris H doubled as cape check.

Lindzi walks upto Ben..he gives the teh sandwich method of Bachelor feedback Positive, surprie negative, positive. He walks her back up to the mountain...she tells him "call me if it doesn't work"..seriously?? her and Jamie need to talk to Brad's therapist...Leftovers only get better with spaghetti sauce and sarma..that's it. moving along

Courtney
Much to nobody's surprise..Courtney will be chosen..Her cape was very Tom Fordesque..kinda like the one Gwenyth wore to the Oscars. Those black gloves..those look like the ones I bougth for my high school grad...and then the bedazzled back strap. Maybe the Swiss aren't known for their even wear.
Channelling Gwenyth Paltron at the Oscars..Courtney had the same black gloves I wore at my high school grad.
He picks Courtney..says some sweet things. He gets down on one knee..first words out of Courtney's mouth was..I love it..note..not I love you..but I love it. If I were Ben I would have taken it as a sign..and hightailed it out of there with the helicopeter. Okay Courtney likes the ring.she commented that its really heavy..hmm suspicious..the promise eachother forver..well that's until... AFTER THE ROSE.

Syopsis of AFTER THE ROSE..
they broke up....Ben listened to Beyonce and put a ring on it..
We'll see how long that lasts..

UNTIL NEXT TIME..(can't wait for the Canadian version) J'aime/ I LOVE this show!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WT......A

Oh gosh..I hit Publish Post..and My blog got lost...
Ahhhh!!!
Here's the jist..
This episode should be called Women Talk Alot
-Blakely wore shoulder duster earring again.
-kacey is still adorable
-Emily's dress was held up by a) starch b) boning c) the Grace of God d) all of the above
-1 more hour in studio Emily woul dhave had a wardrobe malfunction a la Janet Jackson or J Lo
-Jacyln wears yucky makeup
-Emily is happy Ben didn't choose her, makes some statistical probability statment of n=25 means that not all women would like eachother. Meaningless. She likely didn't defend her thesis yet. Perhaps she could study trends in Bachelor trends. Interesting there aren't many ethnicities represented in the Bachelor.
-Chris' hair was extra pouffy
-Chris is why I watch the WTA-he is very BF Skinner in his attempt to understand the womens' behaviour..he asks great questions, is a reflective listener, uses pauses effectively and stops things before they get out of control.
-I'm suprised Jamie isn's living under an assumed identity after her kissing instruction and awkeward attempt at a lap dance. And she had the gall to tell Ben to call her if it doesn't work out with the girl. Eeek..maybe he should order the kissing manual ahead if he does.
-Best quote of the night- to Samantha.."you wer ethe chihuahua of the mansion, you wouldn't shut up"
-Meanest stuff uttered to Shawntel "you are uglier in person, your thights are bigger than mine". They should have a no bully clause at teh Bachelor
-Weak attempt to make it right. Emily to Shawntel after the mean quotes: "Shawntel, you're gorgeous"..if she wasn't gorgeous, would the mean comments be more okay?
-most doubtful Brittney: " I didn't feel an attraction to Ben"..hmm..I think she saw the writing on the wall..
-Best move..Courtney..to keep quiet and let the girls talk over eachother..they sounded crazy
-worst apology(ies) Courtney..to all...seemed very hollow.
-Best make up...Courtney..(and it held up well...with the one tear that rolled down her face
-Most insensitive (2nd to comments directed to Shawntel)..Ben comes on stage and says "welcome to my nightmare"..hmm perhaps something a bit self deprecating like "this feels awkward for me"..what a ding dong he is sometime.




Next..week..is the big night..in Switzerland?? hmm..i would have thought it would have been in his vineyard..
until next week..I love this show (except for WTA)