Brussels

Brussels is beautiful. The nerdy dietitian in me is happy that maybe Bachelorette nation can now note how to spell the super vegetable - Brussels sprouts (cruciferious, sulphorophane isothiocyanate containing vegetable that contains in anticancer properties in experimental conditions). It's not brussel sprout, brussels sprouts but Brussels sprouts. Everyone got it?

but nary a Brussels sprouts dish was seen on this show…then again…very little eating on this show. The steal an occasional bite of street food.

This was a very important episode in Andi's journey…the journey is winding to hometowns..
When the men arrive in Brussels, it's like they were on Team hoodie or Team scarf. Was it windy in Brussels..Marcus, Nick and even Chris the farmer had a scarf on..the sporty dudes Josh and Bryan were without scarves. It look like Nick got Cody's old v-neck t-shirt…but his was much more loosely fitting than it would fit on Cody.

The date card arrives..and it goes to Marcus…
Mussels in Brussels
Nope. Mussels the seafood, nope Cody did not make a comeback. This is  feasting date. The two get some chocolates, stop for mussels (not oysters..this is not the FOD yet), then a fancy dinner. Marcus reflects openly with Andi that he was reviewing his journal..and there were so many mentions of Andi. Andi meanwhile is feasting on this information. This episode more than any, i realized that words of affirmation is Andi's love language. She wants the guys to tell her how much they love her. She also made sure to remind Marcus that he wanted to leave at one point. Didn't we review that in previous episodes. Andi needs a lot of reassurance. At their fancy dinner, Andi did not wear anything sparkly (remarkable). Marcus opened up about complex family dynamics..but i'm not sure what he was trying to say. Bottom line him and his ma are all good in the 'hood now. And they have coffee every week. And he sees or talks to his sister every day (sounds like my relationship with my sister- fist bump seka). Marcus throws down the word soulmate and love and there is vigourous kissing. I think that deal is sealed for hometowns.

Security infraction
Well, Bryan keeps saying how smart Marcus is…apparently he can outsmart any basic hotel security procedure and get a room key by saying he forgot his room key. No ID required..well, maybe hotel staff thought this was being filmed so it would be okay to hand over the key. Nick surprised Andi. She looked happy to see him.they went out..for a little walk, sat at a cafe with no patrons.then had some steamy make out session. Andi likes initiative and Nick delivered.

Josh..getting his Ghent on
I'm not sure that a visit to Ghent will turn Josh into  gent. Josh seems like a bit of a stunted dude. A lot of the guys seem to put their feet on the tables in the hotel rooms, but Josh seems to do it the most. He did change out of his unzipped hoodie and put on a collared shirt. I don't see what Andi sees in Josh…apparently she's gone for this sporty type before. Well, maybe she enjoys vague answers and the occasional show of affection. I think Josh thinks his presence is a present to Andi. She had to take this guy to a castle and in a circular way get him to say what he feels. She says "what would you tell your family about your feelings for me".  Then he finally says i would say i'm falling  in love with you! Score for the sporty dude!!! That makes Andi happy..so happy she takes him outside for more awkward dancing on a raised platform among Belgians standing around trying not to look at them.
That was one ridiculous dance party. But Andi's got her hands in the air and waving' them like she just don't care. She's still into sporty dudes. Btw..Andi looks amazing in white pants...

The antithesis of the FOD - Monastery date

What a departure for the show. The group date is at a monastery where there is no kissing allowed. Dylan, Bryan, Nick and Chris. There is  rose on this date. The person awarded the rose gets to continue with Andi. First one on one time goes to Chris..where they step off sacred grounds and help make beautiful pottery together. I think there was an attempt to make a nod at the Ghost movie scene. Even though that wasn't successful, there is not denying that Chris has got it join' on…they kiss make a pot..and back Chris goes onto sacred ground.  As Bryan gets more nervous he perserverates on Nick. His lack of confidence is palpable. He keeps talking about a game plan. I see no game. I see Bryan deferring to Nick and Nick's smarts. Dylan is mainly quiet. Nick gets the rose…the other 3 go home angry at how disingenuous Nick is. I'm not sure Nick is that shallow. Nick and Andi have dinner..Andi seems to choose a jacket that is not sequinned look sparkly - what kind of jacket was that?

Nick comes back to the hotel and awkwardly sits with the guys. Marcus is using the hotel amenities - the white slippers. A guy in white slippers looks less serious. Josh is sitting there in his white athletic socks with his feet on the table.  Bryan launches into to Nick. Nick is unaffected. Chris looks like he would run Nick over with his John Deere if given the opportunity. They all accuse Nick of talking strategy and game instead of true love. Whoa..this Nick-picking on Nick is getting tiresome. Dylan is not there..he's probably in the bathroom not washing his hands.

Rose ceremony
Okay..that dress. That was some serious sparkly rocks affixed to the dress..of various shapes and sizes. Oh Andi..let go of the sparkle. Nick interrupts Bryan's one on one time…probably to make Bryan crazy..but for what reason..to tell Andi that he has a big target on him. It's okay. Andi likes the attention.Chris throws down the gauntlet , I mean the pitchfork, he tells Andi..he comes from a small place..758 people to be exact.and it's beautiful..on and that he loves her…then he comes back !!   Chris goes against the grain and tells her as firm as the ground he stands on that she is the apple of her eye and come hell or high water his love is pure as the driven snow..and plants a kiss on her. God bless the farmer y'all.


The teariest of all Rose ceremonies
This is real y'all. We're gonna meet families.
And the roses go to …Nick (already awarded), Josh (seriously?), Marcus..then…Chris!!
uh-oh…Dylan and Bryan are gone. Dylan makes an honourable exit..he says he deserves love….Bryan.oh..poor guy..he thought Andi was his woman of his dreams. Yes Bryan..in your dreams. Unfortunately..laughs erupt from the castle as Bryan is on the outs and on the outside.  Bryan is crying..someone hand him some gatorade.

Andi asks the remaining guys for a smile..because…next week is hometowns y'all..
until next week…I love this show!!!!!!

Italy ~ Andi's favourite country…or is it??

This was a disjointed episode. I mean there were many attempts to capture the cliche but I didn't get a central theme from this episode. Another episode looking for a bit of drama - where there is not so much..well except for Cody…he has enough pent up energy to fuel most of the gondolas in Venice..but more on Cody later.
The men arrive in Italy…yelling 'yahoo' as they approach the port. Sigh. Soo attention seeking.

Andy greets them. Wow..do Cody's muscular legs look good in his jeans. All are expecting for Cody to get the one on one..but it goes to Nick.  They have a ride on the gondola, they eat pizza on a stoop, try on some masks. Nick makes some attempt to discuss his trustworthiness. He doesn't say much but it's enough for Andy. Date is not over yet since.. there is dinner. The dinner date was completely over the top, ball gown, tux. It seemed like a bad Hollywood movie that went straight to DVD.  Nick pulls a Cody and says he is grateful for the connection him and Andy have. They don't eat. and he tells her confidently…that he is falling in love with her.But wait..is that music..oh..a concert too (complete with an accordion…i heart accordions)…i think this show is determined to make Andi a good dancer. They dance. Oh yeah ..nick got the rose. Andi's pumped that he believes in this 'process'. Maybe she gets an extra kickback from the producers if she converts bachelors to believe…in the amazing televised journey to true love. Nick gets the rose!

Group date
Andy and the guys are subjected to a lie detector test. I'm not going to lie..but I didn't like Andi's scarf. Was she covering a coffee stain? I didn't get it!They guys read her results. Andy doesn't like Italy y'all. Andy rips up the guys' results.  Dylan has to excuse himself..he's not feeling well ..umm maybe because he doesn't wash his hands after using the bathroom?!? At the 'after the lie detector test cocktail party' Josh voices his displeasure. Josh is tiresome and shallow. His teeth are still super sparkly..he's probably laying off the red vino and espresso. Bryan take charge and has one on one time…he seems lacklustre, but he seems eager to learn. Andi likes take charge guys (who doesn't?), Bryan's simulated lie detector test was cutesy but not interesting. And it was revealed that Chris was the secret admirer..i knew it wasn't Josh, Bryan or Cody..i can't seem them throwing the word 'cusp' into a letter. Good job Chris. Chris seems like a bit of a tough guy, with a soft side. Sweet. And he can bale hay. Quite a combo. Chris gets the rose!


The eager bird does not always get the worm
I cringed often during this date. Let me count the ways.
Cody states he's going to make Andy fall in love with him. Whoa Cody. You are not bench pressing a personal best, you are dealing with emotions here and more importantly - another person. Cody is super enthusiastic, but his enthusiasm hints of desperation. Cody doesn't seem overly deep - but he does have very dense muscle fibres:) I thought it was funny that he had a deeper plunging neckline than Andi on their dinner date. Cody then went on ad nauseum about how much he cared for her and was pleading his case about how he wanted to bring her home to Chicago. Cody could not read Andi at all. Andi made a great call to end it. Awwww. poor Cody. I bet he's going to hit the gym hard and wear a killer tight t-shirt on Men Tell All…I'm guessing he's be a hit at Bachelor Pad. Cody leaves. (I didn't know there were mini-vans in Italy)

Cocktail party
Josh is getting annoying. JJ pants guy plants an awkward kiss on Andi. Bryan writes a honest cute love letter to Andi…and endearing compared to Cody's sugar-laden letter. Dylan needs encouragement to go talk to Andi…

And the person going home is….
JJ
I was surprised that J stayed. Josh that is…but I did think JJ was kinda awkward with Andi. I guess she does wear the pants on the show.

Until next week in Brussels..Adoro questo show!!!!!
PS I hope this show embarrasses Dylan into washing his hands after he uses the bathroom.

Whoa..que c'etait ennuyeux

You didn't understand the title? Let me mime that for you:
*yawn*

En anglais: whoa..that was boring.
After a two week hiatus, I was expecting a lot more from this episode.
They are in Marseille which was a lovely  backdrop for …yawwwwn..romance and the journey to true love.

My eyebrow raising moment had nothing to do with the remaining men..it was Chris Harrison's turtleneck choice. I'm pretty sure my mom has the similar one (hey Mare.. you know mom's silverish Laundry by Shelli Segal turtleneck she bought at Winners?).  Was it that cold in Marseille..how can Andi sit there in a short shirt and shirt whilst Chris is layering in a turtleneck and jacket. Well maybe as the directly translated Croatian saying goes "Love is keeping her warm".

I thought in this episode that Andi was styled a bit more to keep more of a classic look. Well it was all great until she had to pull a white sequinned skirt.

Okay…enough of the sartorial report..it's date time.
Josh (aka 50 shades of whiteness)
I'm talking about his teeth - I am not making any racial commentary..I'll leave that (allegedly) to Andrew. Man does Josh have white teeth. I'm actually worried for his enamel. Josh got the one on one..and he is happy. Like Pharell happy.  And so is Andi..Andi digs Josh. Big time. I know she wants to get all nautical with him :) so they go sailing and exchange windy kisses bow side. They sail to the Calanques which Andy pronounces Kalonk (probably because she uses the word badonkadonk because she's southern y'all). The pull out some provisions out of a canvas bag..which happens to have glasses in it that didn't break). Is the date over yet? Main non!! they go to the Palais Longchamp…where Andi wants to have a serious conversation with him. She has dated athletes and they have a bad rep in her books (yikes..so many stereotypes in this show). And they have a serious conversation, I guess if compliments are serious conversation. They definitely were not talking about the outcome of Ukraine's election or issues about whether Russia is going to cut off its gas supply. But maybe those conversations are for non-Palais dates. Why be a buzzkill in the Palais Longchamps? Ooo la la..the date is not over! We have a private concert! Josh is pumped again that Ben Field (?)  is playing a concert. Ben was averting eye contact as actively as anyone who does hip thrusts at the gym. Andi and Josh swayed and kissed parce que aucun d'eux ne peut danser (neither of them can dance)


Group date-Mime
I'm glad a lot of it was silent. There was another performance by the men. They mimed it up in the city square. I thought most of them were pretty good. I loved that Cody chose to lift Andi- not sure if l'hotel has sufficient weights to maintain Cody's physique. Marquel was awesome and adorable as usual. And did Andi call Nick salty or sulky? I'm not sure. Neither made sense. A situation was going to go down and Marquel was going to call out Andrew for calling allegedly calling him blackie. First I thought JJ shouldn't have said that unless he knew for sure what Andrew said…but there was one moment in the show where I was moved and that's when Marquel talked about how awful it is to have perceptions and to be categorized without knowing the person. I can't say I've ever experience rascism, but none likes to be judged or pigeon holed. I'm with you Marquel. Marquel confronted Andrew face to face and relatively drama free. Good job.
The mime after party was lacking..and not in an understated way but in an underwelming way. JJ took Andi for a Ferriis wheel ride.that was thoughtful..Nick put pen to paper. Who doesn't like a bit of effort? Cody thanked Andi again for being there..i know Cody is sensitive about being bugged about being grateful so I'll say nothing.
 JJ gets the rose.

Cooking date
I'm with Brian…that is not my comfort zone..but he could have just owned it. Just slam dunked the grenouille in flour and fried them. Called time outs for kitchen make out sessions. Seems like Brian only gets confident on the basketball court. He did clue in when they went out for dinner..but he resorted to his court kiss..but took her into the kitchen to kiss her…in full view of the restaurant patrons - i'm sure some of the French were throwing around some American stereotypes in their mind.

What? No cocktail party?
To add some hint of drama, I'm guessing the producers axed the cocktail party. Andi knows what she wants..and gives 3 guys the boot so they will not go visit the boot next week.
Andrew- who doesn't get it..and says he was bullied.
Patrick- also doesn't get it..and lets us know that many people think he has marriage qualities
Marquel-adorable, loving Marquel..says this was not in God's plan..but it has helped him believe in love…Awwww…


Next week….venice..and until then…J'aime ce spectacle!!
PS Did you notice that Andi did not say y'all in France?

:(

This makes me sad. I can't write a rose report.
Makes you think about your conversations you have with people - that they may be the last ones.
RIP Eric.

Boyz will be boyz - part un

I'm not sure what spurred this two night Bachelor event. Nothing too exciting happened..even Andi's tank top choices were underwelming.

First one on one
Nick emerged - no longer reserved. It's amazing what happens when you get out of the house, get some fresh air and get a whole new perspective. They went for a bike ride..in pink and blue helmets. She had the picnic in her basket, but then he carried it up the hill. They suddenly were clothed in hoodies. He told Andi, she had a great resume then said he had a big crush on her.
For the evening part of the date, they had dinner at the courthouse. Maybe the courthouse cafeteria caters, but they had a table in the courtyard. She asks him a ridiculous question: "you're so great, why aren't you married"..Allow me  a moment..but what the eff kind of question is that. Andy use your cross-examining skills. I don't know how one is supposed to answer that question. When people ask that question, I think they mean it as a back handed compliment but the answer is so simple that it eludes most people:
"I haven't met anyone I want to marry" I'm not sure what other type of answers one could give:
a) Oh? I'm awesome. yikes! Thanks..what am I doing here with you. I'm outta here!
b) Yeah. I'm awesome. Noone wants awesome, attractive witty and successful anymore.
c)   I don't have another option..that question is so dumb..
Nick seems like a pretty interesting guy. I'm not sure if his trepidation was a game plan or if he suddenly felt something for Andi. An Andi said she wants to turn Nick into a believer.  Well, all around the world, we all want to be loved. It seems after this date Nick is definitely a Belieber.

ps..what kind of weird trench/sport jacket was he wearing at dinner. It was like Eddie Bauer and Banana Repulic did a mash up. I also think Nick should have asked Brett the hairstylist to give him a trim and maybe some product.  I think the humidity of Santa Barbara was messing his 'do.

Boyz II Men!!
The highlight of the show was seeing Boyz II Men.. I think two of the men were hung over since they wore sunglasses the entire time…even rehearsing indoors.
This group date was the longest perhaps most drawn out group date. Their performance was horrible. Clearly there was not enough content for the two night Bachelorette extravaganza since the whole terrible performance was not edited.
The dimmest comment of this episode..and I'm guessing for this season was by Josh "For the first time I'll have to use my voice to impress a woman". Soooo, he usually signs on dates? communicates non verbally??
I actually really felt for Bradley..i don't think he picks up on any cues…he thought his voice would carry:) him in this competition..and that it would someone get him a rose.
There was a lot of enthusiasm on this date! Cody was a front runner..not due to his athletic prowess..but  his energy is crazy..maybe he's crushing some pre-workout caffeinated drink before group dates..but this guy has a lot of endorphins. He seems jacked about everything from Boyz II Men to Andi.

After the concert..they have a wind-up party. Whoa..Andi is randy..she likes to make out with all the boys. She is soaking in all the attention and praise. Bryan told he he is devoted to her. Marcus tells her he has feelings for her..and starts to rub her knee..then announces that he wants to kiss her…huge potential for awkwardness..except for the fact that Andi loves to kiss the guys. Awkwardness avoided.

Dress up date
Andi picks JJ for the one on one date. JJ the pantsapreneur…wears one of his creations with green pockets,but puts on an unspiring grey Hanes men's undershirt. Maybe that's what all the hipster pants dudes do.
They get created to age 50 years…JJ actually looks like an older man…and they go on a date feigning kyphosis and Parkinsonian symptoms. sigh.
JJ likes Andi..he kisses her on the tire in the park. somehow Andi believes she can grow old with him…not sure how she arrived at the conclusion.
At their dinner ..the turned back the clock and had a glass of wine on the couch. JJ revealed his quirkiness.and Andi told her that endeared him to her.  That's awesome…we all have our inner geek and quirks…i think JJ's quirkiness is like cream..it just rises to the top… (i like to think my inner geek is well-emulsified)
She gives him the rose…even with his paisley pants.

Cocktail party
Eric gets upstaged on his one on one time by a delivery of flowers by Nick. That was pretty slick of Nick…and very in your face move to the rest of the dudes. This is likely going to unleash a tidal wave of thoughtful gestures and gifts. Marcus was on it and wrote her a note…likely didn't have enough time for cookie-gram…but then again.the cookie thing was already taken by smooth as buttah Marquel.
Some faux drama..Josh called Andrew out for getting a number from a waitress and making a mockery of the sacred process of the Bachelor. After Cody, I vote Josh as being 2nd most likely to punch someone in the face. (this was the first episode I noticed Josh's tattoos on his biceps)..i'm not sure what they said. Andrew said (after he came down from hiding in his room) that the waitress gave him her number (I guess he couldn't refuse it). JJ is pretty upset that Andrew would do this.i'd say he has his knickers in a knot about it.

Au revoir to
Ron - he left early…for a sad reason :(
Bradley- most operas are tragedies..
Brett- he seemed non plussed about it..but his hair was totally fab.

Until next week  tomorrow…I love this show!!!!!!!