Monday, June 16, 2014

Whoa..que c'etait ennuyeux

You didn't understand the title? Let me mime that for you:
*yawn*

En anglais: whoa..that was boring.
After a two week hiatus, I was expecting a lot more from this episode.
They are in Marseille which was a lovely  backdrop for …yawwwwn..romance and the journey to true love.

My eyebrow raising moment had nothing to do with the remaining men..it was Chris Harrison's turtleneck choice. I'm pretty sure my mom has the similar one (hey Mare.. you know mom's silverish Laundry by Shelli Segal turtleneck she bought at Winners?).  Was it that cold in Marseille..how can Andi sit there in a short shirt and shirt whilst Chris is layering in a turtleneck and jacket. Well maybe as the directly translated Croatian saying goes "Love is keeping her warm".

I thought in this episode that Andi was styled a bit more to keep more of a classic look. Well it was all great until she had to pull a white sequinned skirt.

Okay…enough of the sartorial report..it's date time.
Josh (aka 50 shades of whiteness)
I'm talking about his teeth - I am not making any racial commentary..I'll leave that (allegedly) to Andrew. Man does Josh have white teeth. I'm actually worried for his enamel. Josh got the one on one..and he is happy. Like Pharell happy.  And so is Andi..Andi digs Josh. Big time. I know she wants to get all nautical with him :) so they go sailing and exchange windy kisses bow side. They sail to the Calanques which Andy pronounces Kalonk (probably because she uses the word badonkadonk because she's southern y'all). The pull out some provisions out of a canvas bag..which happens to have glasses in it that didn't break). Is the date over yet? Main non!! they go to the Palais Longchamp…where Andi wants to have a serious conversation with him. She has dated athletes and they have a bad rep in her books (yikes..so many stereotypes in this show). And they have a serious conversation, I guess if compliments are serious conversation. They definitely were not talking about the outcome of Ukraine's election or issues about whether Russia is going to cut off its gas supply. But maybe those conversations are for non-Palais dates. Why be a buzzkill in the Palais Longchamps? Ooo la la..the date is not over! We have a private concert! Josh is pumped again that Ben Field (?)  is playing a concert. Ben was averting eye contact as actively as anyone who does hip thrusts at the gym. Andi and Josh swayed and kissed parce que aucun d'eux ne peut danser (neither of them can dance)


Group date-Mime
I'm glad a lot of it was silent. There was another performance by the men. They mimed it up in the city square. I thought most of them were pretty good. I loved that Cody chose to lift Andi- not sure if l'hotel has sufficient weights to maintain Cody's physique. Marquel was awesome and adorable as usual. And did Andi call Nick salty or sulky? I'm not sure. Neither made sense. A situation was going to go down and Marquel was going to call out Andrew for calling allegedly calling him blackie. First I thought JJ shouldn't have said that unless he knew for sure what Andrew said…but there was one moment in the show where I was moved and that's when Marquel talked about how awful it is to have perceptions and to be categorized without knowing the person. I can't say I've ever experience rascism, but none likes to be judged or pigeon holed. I'm with you Marquel. Marquel confronted Andrew face to face and relatively drama free. Good job.
The mime after party was lacking..and not in an understated way but in an underwelming way. JJ took Andi for a Ferriis wheel ride.that was thoughtful..Nick put pen to paper. Who doesn't like a bit of effort? Cody thanked Andi again for being there..i know Cody is sensitive about being bugged about being grateful so I'll say nothing.
 JJ gets the rose.

Cooking date
I'm with Brian…that is not my comfort zone..but he could have just owned it. Just slam dunked the grenouille in flour and fried them. Called time outs for kitchen make out sessions. Seems like Brian only gets confident on the basketball court. He did clue in when they went out for dinner..but he resorted to his court kiss..but took her into the kitchen to kiss her…in full view of the restaurant patrons - i'm sure some of the French were throwing around some American stereotypes in their mind.

What? No cocktail party?
To add some hint of drama, I'm guessing the producers axed the cocktail party. Andi knows what she wants..and gives 3 guys the boot so they will not go visit the boot next week.
Andrew- who doesn't get it..and says he was bullied.
Patrick- also doesn't get it..and lets us know that many people think he has marriage qualities
Marquel-adorable, loving Marquel..says this was not in God's plan..but it has helped him believe in love…Awwww…


Next week….venice..and until then…J'aime ce spectacle!!
PS Did you notice that Andi did not say y'all in France?

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