Happy Victoria Day

Hi y'all...and Happy Victoria Day On this regal holiday...episode 2 of the Bachelorette. Conversation was lacking and so was personality in some of the bachelors. Well the dating pool seems to be a bit low. Hopefully I'll hit some of the highlights. Date #1..Ryan..the pro sports trainer Ryan tends to have sharp lines..his hair, chiseled features (likely matched by chest)..but that's where the sharpness ends. He is flat and cliche. His Christian references also fell flat. When he found out he got the rose..he quoted his pastor who said if you treat a woman like a queen, she'll treat you like a king. Hmm..you'd think there would be something Christ-like vs. Monarchy like. But back to the date. Sporty Emily picks him up..to take him to her house. Before Ryan can say What the H - E - double hockey sticks...Emily says he has to haul groceries to her house. Very nice environmental mesh bags her groceries were in. She wanted to show him how unglamourous life could be. She was tryin' to keep the real in reality show. Next step cookie baking because it was Emily's turn to bring snacksto Ricky's soccer game. Ryan evn donned apron (quickly after he said..let's finish these cookies so I can feel like a man again). Through the TV..I could feel no chemistry between them. There was no conversation besides either of them stating what was going on in front of them. Then Emily is off to be snack mom. Whoa..was Ricky's team running a marathon or playing rec soccer. Juice, cookies and oranges. I'm not hatin' on the carbs..but that's a bit much for snack time. Water and orange sections would have sufficed. But enought of my dietary editorializing. phew..after mom duty..Emily needs areal date. She got outta her mom clothes and put a dress on...She picked him up..but let him drive the car.Off to Ousso they go.....but not before a throng of adoring fans waited for the car to arrive outside he restaurant. They ate, talked little. He didnt answer her question about whether he saw this as a competition. He did say he would compete by putting his best foot forward, then he asked her question. She also made some weird comment about her wanting the man to be in charge, but she'd be in charge...she awarded the rose..then one more surprise!! An open air show with a stage for them to dance one. Ryan's not the worst dancer...but I find him annoying and lacking substance. Group date- Muppets and a nod to the King's Speech It's group date performance time! Performance is a strong word for what happened. Kudos to the guys for raising money for the children's hospital intensive care-but did anyone see any entertainment value (well besides Miss Piggy and Kermit who were spectacular). The Bachelor/Bacheloette enterprise seeks to inspire when it can. This time..it was Charly's story. Charly apparently fell 15 storeys and required major rehabilitation and had to relearn how to talk. This variety show and speaking in front of others was giving him anxiety. But the guy is on a show that has millions of viewers..what's a couple hundred of people in Charlotte. But..he explained this to the very understanding Emily..and he was reassigned another role in the show. So this wasn't Broadway- but there was no entertainment value in the show at all...the'dance' routine..Emily didn't dance but just shook a little in her shiny dress. The comedy wasn't funny (and also used weight biased humor..which is a personal pet peeve)..and the interviews by Miss Piggy..weren't that interesting Charly spoke!! and did well!! Congrats Charly. King George would have been proud. After every group date variety show there's a wrap up party. This confused me. There was a rose to be awarded..and she gave it to Jef. (it's hard to miss the second f..so I'll use it to say wtF was she thinking by giving it to him. Ithink they have no chemistry. Unless she likes dudes who sport Justin Bieber's and Robin Thicke's new 'do. I don't get it. The other thing I don't get is Kalon's vocabulary. Actually I do get it, he likes to use polysyllabic words incorrectly and messes up his metaphors. ie "I'm eloquent in how I conduct myself" and "It's the intangible things that I can't articulate". I think his problem is that he can't articulate. But the one thing that did ring true was when Emily said to Kermit..."you gotta kiss a lotta frogs..before you meet a prince". Amen. Date #3 Come close to my heart... It's off to the Greenbrier Joe and Emily go. That fancy,opulent and at times tacky hotel of Emily's youth...where she swam, went to the spa..and had her first makeover!!! Emily and Joe took a dip in the pool.Emily tried to see if her and Joe would have some chemistry. Emily got dressed for dinner pretty as a princess...with lots of crinolin under it to make it extra flouncy...but alas the chemistry seemed to be lacking. Joe was not her prince. Props to Emily for asking Joe some tough questions at dinner. Where do you see yourself in five years. Happy he responds. Emily: what does that mean? happy with my decisions, no regrets. I started to sense he had no direction. Emily lobbeda few more ideas his way. Joe seemed blank. They wrote wishes to the Love Clock. Tick tock..Joe's time was up. He did not take it well. He seemed ticked and brash. Good choice Emily! Back at the mansion..Doug and Kalon were exchanging words..when Kalon seemed to question Doug's loyalty to his son b/c he was on the show. Cocktail Party/Rose Ceremony Emily chose a regal colour- purple for this occasion. It was a bit tacky..looked like she was off to grade 12 grad..but I liked her green earrings. Kalon told her he was an oldman trapped in a young man's body. Ryan was proud that he wrote 7 whole pages or Emily!! which Tony the lumber trader heard her read them all back to Ryan. (i'm not sure why she chose to read it all aloud). Tony told her that he has a 5 year old. Arie got some one on one time with Emily. He makes Emily nervous apparently. Well..they all got roses except Kyle and Scott... I'm looking forward to more exchanges between Kalon and Scott. I can't decide if I think Chris is cute or he looks like the guy on he Mar Orthodontics commercial. I wonder if Alejandro and Alessandro will ever speak or if Emily will keep awarding them roses based on their awesome names. Doug the dad is a cutie..but he says "check it" too often..on this episode anyway. Tony ...the lumber guy..looks like he starts to crack in the upcoming episodes..and Kalon the dude with the Louis Vuitton luggage cracks meup. until next week..happy holiday Monday..happy bday Queen Victoria..and godspeed to the remaining bachelors.. ILOVE THIS SHOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!