Please sing along the next few paragraphs to the tune of
Everybody (Backstreet's Back)...by the Back Street Boys
Oh my God we're back again (watching the Bachelor)
Brothers sisters everybody sing (yes I love watching it with Dave Mary..and Nat)
Gonna bring you flavor and show you how
Gotta question for you (will he pick one)
better answer now (Brad..you better pick someone this season)
Is he original (Noooooooooo)
Is he the only one (Yeahh...he's my favourite bachelor)
Is he sexual (well apparently for the previews of the upcoming episodes)
Is he everything you need (from all that therapy he is still needing some help with self esteem)
You better rock your body now (we know that Keltie will Rockette it out for sure)
....................
sigh...i love the BSB...
But back to my true Bachelor love. Brad.
Fellow rose report followers know that I love Brad and I think he made his decision for all the right reasons not picking someone. Well he was nauseatingly contrite about the last experience...but why pick someone if you're not ready.
His therapist may have helped him work out his issues of commitment, but Brad still should have logged in some time and worked on his feelings of self worth. I ain't no Carl Jung or Freud, but anyone who's seen a handful of Oprah episodes could tell you that.
What Brad has worked out is his fine form. Happily the producers still think the topless workout scenes are important. Did Brad have that tatoo on his back from last season...alas..maybe he feels he has a large cross to bear.
The shows start was sloooooowww. It could have been done in 10 minutes..Brad had commitment issues due to some childhood abandonment. That was sad..but wow..I guess when you sign up for this show again...you have to reveal so much. Completely unnecessary to have Deanna and Jenny back. Deanna's engagement ring has some sparkly competition..not from Jenny's...but from Deanna's own body glitter. Both girls look great..and Deanna made sure to tell Brad that she's found happiness now (b/c I guess before she was engaged she was unhappy?), but she looked sour for most of the interview...maybe she was supposed to be Jenny's character foil..or Brad's?
But back to what we really came for...who will Brad choose from.
Wow..30 women! Lots of unflattering dresses..and the craziest shoes from any season....the platform hot pink, the Oz-esque ruby red slippers..and my least favourite show..the slip on high heeled mule.
Can't go through all the ladies...
but I wonder...
-was the smack by Chantal O necessary? And why would Brad say he deserved it..yikes...i'm still convinced he's not done with Dr. Thomas Parker...and why would the Bachelor think it's okay that hitting is okay. Not cool.
-what's up with the Madison the vampire? Is the Bachelor trying to cash in on the vampire craze. Seems kinda fake.
-Will Keltie (the rockette) and Ashley (the dancing dentist) have a dance off?
-Will Raichel continue to manscape Brad? Is that literal peeling off Brad's layers? Stripping off his defences?
-Michelle looked great in her crazy tribal dress with her earrings past her armpits
It's gonna be a great show!! I'm looking forward to Brad's long jogs down the beach...
Best quote of the night:
"Its better to be home alone than to be at home wishing you were alone"
Amen sista.
Until next week..
I LOVE THIS SHOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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