The Outtake- who saw it

This episode...was meh as they say?
Do you know what that means? Meh means indifference or simply not caring. Juan Pablo learned a few lines or phrased too.like 'cut to the chase', bolt. I was a bit cool to this episode

Mind you, I think most to the girls were a bit chilly. New Zealand didn't seem particularly warm that time of year. But is was picturesque. A ya ya..as Juan Pablo likes to say.

First date:
Andi. She finally gets a date. She goes to "The Squeeze" with her "Squeeze". JP takes her on a chauffered whip around a body of water..(sans seat belt and life jacket again!). She doesn't know where they are going...but like all good bachelorettes, she has her bathing suit on under her casual outfit. Wow..she looks amazing in white pants. Then she also looks good in a one pieced. Did anyone else wonder how her bathing suit stayed put without riding up. They made there way to a warmer part and stood and canoodled (appropriately?) under the waterfall. A perfect photo op for a Bachelor date.
I guess making out in the waterfall is different than the ocean date with Clare.
Then they dine geyser-side and surprisingly? they get splashed. They hug and Andi tells him she wants true love. Right reason. Unoriginal.

Let love roll

Well, no safety needed here..hopefully the OGOs are puncture proof. The girls come for a little picnic..well it was more of a coffee date...and then JP takes them to the OGO. It looks super fun.

It's Cassandra's birthday! She's 22..and she thinks she could fall in love with JP. I thought it was ominous that JP didn't acknowledge her birthday. Seemed unlike the doting South American.

To celebrate rolling down the hill..they have a group cocktail party...which basically was a holding place for the girls while JP took most of the girls to the kissing chair. Oh..but they are on the set of the Hobbit..I'm guessing Sharleen is the only one who read the book (umm i haven't even seen the movie..is it a big deal to be on set?) JP overuses 'have a good time', but Sharleen's word in organic. Tonight..she feels it is inorganic. Now I sound like JP..what does that mean..like really? Then she kisses him..and then it's organic again. I'm not sure she has her organic labels correct. It's a confusing journey..that's for sure. All JP tells her is that she's nervous but that she's good..and then Sharleen feels understood.

But JP did have a change of heart and let Cassandra go. Cassandra handled it well..but really..did she really care about JP. Hopefully Cassandra had a nice birthday flight . Renee is now wondering if the single mom's are not the 'special ones' anymore. JP does say that he is mesmerized by Renee's eyes. I like Renne..i think she is an excellent reflective listener..but does anyone sense chemistry between those two? I dunno

I can't believe Clare is still here

My friend astutely texted me and said that he gave Clare a 1:1 so that she doesn't tell the girls what happened. Yep that's probaby right. Clare thinks JP should apologize for what he said to her...which noone is really saying anything what happened at 4 AM in the ocean. JP hands her some platitudes about his conduct in front of his daughter. Good idea..but maybe he should be aware that he is being filmed. That was JP back peddling. Clare somehow took this as an apology. I didn't hear an apology. JP asked her promise that she wouldn't cry because of him! What kind of request is that? Then her and JP put their comfies on and hang out on the couch. He made her change in another room (because he's decent that way that JP)..then she does an odd crotch grab on her Hammer pants. JP thinks those pants look better than her cocktail dress. They cuddle..she gets a rose..oh..and then they dance...which as we all know by now..turns into a salsa

Rose Ceremony

Despite Cat's deep reveal about her journalling and tough upbringing..she's denied a rose. She thought  sealed the rose for her. Instead it sealed a different fate. 

AFTer the escort to the care..JP is back..and Sharleen is crying..she's confused..and will give it one more week...that's her MO..she gives him one more try.

Guess where next week...Salsa capital of the US..MIAMI...do you think there will be salsaing. I say si!

Until next week..

me encante este show!

 The outake..did anyone see it? A sheep poop fight...how incredibly unsanitary and bacteria riddled...hopefully this isn't foreshadowing.

It happened Juan night

Hola! I mean Hollah!!..We're goin' to Vietnam yo.
And what happened in Vietnam does not stay in Vietnam..it gets broadcast internationally (well mainly in the US and Canada but available for download in the rest of the free world)
What happened one night was really not a romantic comedy..but a comedy of errors...but it leaves me to question...would the real Clare stand up (She always stands out..but we're not really sure who she is)

But back to the dates.
The girls arrive...there outfits for the voyage are either shorts and tank top or lycra capris.  Sidebar: I know I'm obsessed with tank tops. But this Bachelor has thrown me into a tanktop tailspin. Is it the limited shopping in Edmonton , how have i missed all these tank top variations. One (of the dozens) of reasons i like this show is to see what the girls wear casually. I would like to pull off some of their casual fabulousness. Some great scarves too..not sure if they are trying to save their voices or whether it's a drafty place.

The girls arrive without luggage to the Intercontinental. Fabulous hotel. It makes the Bachelor mansion look cozy.
Date card..and it goes to.....
Renee...
Finally, Renee can step away from the therapist's couch to get some much Juan-ted attention from JP.
Guess what ? Renee wants to kiss him.  she is so excited..and she's so nice that the other girls seem to be ok with her going on this date. She tries to curl her hair. Fail. What was the problem. humidity? converter blew? She applies copious layers of make up only to look like she doesn't have any one.
But she looks pretty Zen..but not chill..'cause Renee gets sweaty. More on that in a minute.She meets JP..he says..."we're going to have a good time". I think JP wants to set a new Bachelor record for phraseology. I think he says "we're going to have a good time" about 15 times in the episode. But Renee is already having a good time..you can tell the she strokes JP like a puppy. JP drives her in a cart, they sit on a boat. He buys presents for the kids. Then he is going to get a dress made for her. He is watching as she gets her measurements done and makes sure to zero in on the chest measurement. Renee is getting sweaty..JP goes to get a fan..Renee is moved by the gesture.Way to keep it classy.Renee wants to kiss him still. Denied. They go for a dinner..not a lot of conversation..just mutual compliments...she gets hot again..he starts to blow on her..hopefully there wansn't too much fish sauce or garlic i the dishi'm not convinced he's feelin' Renee..but he thinks there might be something there... Rose Yes. Kiss No. She says she's okay with not kissing him. yeah right.

Bamboo boats, Communal meal, drinks ...then halter top trouble

Who likes a group date? Noone! Well except JP...because 'we're gonna have a good time'.
The go boating in pairs. Clare and JP kiss in the grasses. Back on shore...they drop by a  house. It kinda seemed like a farm. Cassandra noted...we should have this back home. Like farms Cassandra? Community gardens? Someone tell her please that not all food comes from Walmart. The girls gather herbs. Andi complains to JP..she gets reassurance from two words "Trust me". Hmm for a lawyer she doesn't gather a lot of evidence. Back at the hotel the girls and JP have some drinks. JP grabs Clare for a dip in his pool. She had her bikini! Not sure how long they dipped..but bac they came and JP takes most of the girls to talk...and look into his eyes on the beach. Clare gets the rose. Must have been a stellar dip Well...they say you shouldn't double dip..and that's what Clare did. At the respectable hour of 4 AM she thought she'd drop by to say Thank You. But she wanted to go into a bigger body of water.  JP says he wants to make Clare feel comfortable . Torosh!t JP. I guess Clare likes saying thank you in the water. She also said it was pure bliss in every way. That is some water they have in Vietnam.

Nikki.
This was like Chelsea's date. Lots of cables and fear and trusting JP. Sigh...these dates are a bit Tony Robbins -esque..overcoming your fears leads to success..romantic success according to the Bachelor. Nikki wisely states I"m going to live, die or poo my pants. Surprise. She overcomes her fear. She draws a parallel of the descending into a cave like falling in love. Well except for the falling part. They change into something less comfortable and JP asks questions! he asks Nurse Nikki..why she became a nurse and why a pediatric nurse. He has a hard time with the word paediatric...not sure why..its exactly the same as spanish except you add an O. JP likes nikki and awards the rose.

As the tide turns...
Clare starts the night super confident and leads the toast with 'finding, being and making love'.
At the cocktail party..JP is wheelin' them in. He gives besitos to Andi. He changes his tune mid way with Renee..first telling her he treats her differently because of Ben..then she starts telling him its okay..then JP kisses Rennee. Cue happy symphony music. Renne spins out of control..well not really..but when she recounted the kiss to the camera she spun around a few times. Ok JP is a soccer player, good body, cute accent..but spin worthy? But did that kiss set someting off in JP...he is now wondering if he 'going into the water' with Clare was a good idea. And he decides to tell her it wasn't.
Does that public pronouncement absolve him? It's like it was a confession of bad behaviour. Clare is upset..obviously. JP was all about making her feel comfortable that night. JP tries to make Clare feel better by telling her to look at him, just 'delete' the thought and stop crying . (yeah that helps JP). Then he tries again by telling her its ok he just wants to be understood. The girls sense tension. Clare says she's got allergies. Perhaps she's allergic to the torosh!t that JP is feeding her.

Rose Ceremony
It's not surprising who leaves..the people who he never spoke too..Alli, Kelly and Danielle.
But everyone starts crying. JP, the departing girls and the remaining girls. Hmm..hopefully this doesn't turn into a Big Love type of scenario..maybe they could all live together on a bachelor ranch and have a farm...Cassandra can bring the farming concept back to the U S of A.

Until next week..in New Zealand
me encante este show!

Bachelor - Gangam Style!

As if JP wasn't international enough...JP plus 13 are enroute to Seoul (minus Kelly's dog)
Seoul will see 2 Group dates and 1 one on one.

I was expecting Psy at some point..not quite..but close.
The girls have 1 hour to pack..for the international holiday. That sounds like a nightmare...so much packing..so little time. In the airport shots..it looks like the girls brought EVERYTHING.

They settle in to the Hilton. Their suite looked gorgeous!!
Group date 1: K Pop

Who says you don't learn anything on the Bachelor. I didn't know that K Pop meant Korean pop. How is that different than American pop. The girls were going to pop out with 21..the K pop music sensation. Lesson #2..South Koreans have way more colourful and interesting sweatshirts and outfits than we do in C pop or A pop land. I loved the tops!! The tights and bottoms were a little cray.but I loved the colours.
The girls had to do a choreographed dance number and JP was down with poppin' it like it was hot. Nikki was cool to it..and then there was Cat dancing like she was on a hot tin roof. There was a lotta pride, and bootay shakin' and more serious dance face. So Nikki is getting a Negative Nikki rap..but she was pretty funny. I thought she had a pretty good attitude about it..and just got through it. Chelsea seems to just go in whatever direction JP blows..for a science educator..there is not much method to her JP madness. I also thought Cassandra didn't bring a lot of dance moves from her 'former NBA dancer experience"...(low points for artistic merit from the Croatian judge).
For the performance in a mall...JP had a quite a jacket..that was some serious collar going on. I also thought it was odd for the top K pop group with 77 million youtube views that they would be performing in a mall, with only 3 security guards that are wearing suits. I can't see Rhianna or Beyonce performing at the HMV stage in West Ed...maybe the 21 K pop sensation was overblown...like Cat's dance routine.

At the after party...Nikki gets the rose!

One on one date.
Sigh...The Bachelor is not one to miss a cliche. Date card: Are you my Seoul mate?
Well, kinda fitting..because Sharleen has to do some Seoul searching to see if she likes JP...beyond his aesthetic. She wants to see what's shaking in his brain, beyond a catchy Spanish dance tune.
They explore Seoul. I thought her Sharleens nylon and shorts combo was odd, Maybe it's chilly there? Maybe they were sheer lederhosen she brought from Germany?
 They eat some food and have some tea. Sharleen in her charming subtle as a sledgehammer ways tells him he's not bland. Hmm..does she really think so or is she yield to his charms.  He seems to make pretty intense eye contact with her and she doesn't seem like a typical choice for him.so perhaps he does have a few complexities in his character that are not assuaged by Venezuelan food and bumpin' beats.
She seemed like she did let a little bit of her wall come down with him..and not because she belted a couple of operatic notes (i'm unsophisticated in the operatic way..but I thought her warm up routine sounded like she was calling some type of tropical bird).
Kudos to Sharleen for being completely open about her thoughts on kids. And kudos to JP for wanting to get to knowing more.
We know JP digs her 'mondo' and gives her a rosa!


K is for Krazy not for K pop
So as not to be confused with group date number one...there will not be a K pop date, but a Krazy date. No wait...what is a date withJP without music...the first group activity starts with Karaoke!
Well not really.
Not one of them read Korean so they all jump and sweat in this dollhouse like Karaoke place. Then they drink lemonade, do some paddling, eat some Octopus (even Clare kind of ate some, regurgitated, then 'swallowed it back down' - thanks for that explanation Clare..very important for all of us to know that. Isn't 'swallowing it back down' just like saying "I'll respond back "...sigh...poor English drives me a little cray cray. Then after Clare finally had her 5 calorie snack, they had those fish pedicures. Side bar- how safe are those things..i mean hygenically speaking. I don't think those fish get autoclaved after each pedicure. Ewww...not sure how sanitary that is:)
Phew..after all that kraziness..it was back to the hotel for some telling and no kissing. Suddenly JP has a no fly zone over his lip area. Well, he's the Bachelor..and he calls the shots. ALL the ladies want a little kiss from JP...but wouldn't you think the serial kissing on the same night would just seem weird...some serious cross contamination of lip gloss. Poor Lauren asked for a kiss.and was denied..awww..the rejection..that's like landing on your a$$ after trying to do a triple sow cow and having to get up and smile for the crowd (can you tell i'm excited for Sochi?). JP couldn't resist Clare. Now JP is one confusing dude..he is intrigued by Sharleen and by Clare. I don't get it. What I really don't get is Clare's eyebrows. I think she does them like that on purpose. Even her eyebrows are not interesting to me.

Andi gets the rose!

Palatial cocktail party and rose ceremony.
Nikki is rocking the Geobukseon (a Korean warship) with both her negativity and the girl pact of letting girls sans roses only have time with JP. Anyone who has been around the Bachelor mansion block once or twice knows that one is only here for the right reasons..and that is for the Bachelor..therefore one must look out for numero uno. Nikki has JP time..the girls are displeased.
Elise is wearing a weird dress..(are those bedazzled gold spanks shorts under it?). Cassandra looks stunning in yellow....Alison has a lot of features on the back of her dress..and Lauren kind of looks like she has given up.

La rosa ceremonia
Elisa and Lauren ...take a moment and 12 hours to say your good bye  Asia...hello America. It's often a long convoluted journey to search for your Seoul mate. Sing it to me sistahs!

Next stop on the journey to true love..Vietnam!

Until next week...
me encanta este show!!!

I love Lucy

The show opens with JP appearing like a doting dad..feeding his child oceanside. I found it odd that he tried to put chicken in her mouth when she was kind of lying down. Camila likely doesn't have a problem with dysphagia, but one would normally feed a child that is feed a child who is not seated upright. But he gets her to have a piece of pollo before he goes off on his amphibious date.

Back at the manion,Chris Harrison in a poor sartorial choice...a quasi colour blocked - more like a two tone blue shirt. Odd..looked a little country but not really. Chris produced a date card...for Cassandra..Love is a Wild Ride.

Cassandra seems to get confused when she has a lot of thoughts in her head. They say that something needs to be repeat something 20 times to remember something..which is approximately the number of times Cassandra told the camera how long it was that she had a date.
Cassandra gets dropped off for her date..and they hop into a funny looking car. They go for a cruise..then..JP whips onto the sand..bad Venezuelan park job? Heck no, the car is also a jet ski/boat/floatation device. Ahh JP..first tobogganing sans helmet now cruising in your 'car boat' sans life jacket. The zip through the water..and off to a real boat...why? dunno..so they can jump into the water and swim around their car boat. They kiss..carside.

JP who is becoming known for trying to make people feel comfortable. He likes to look 'em in the eyes and tell them "I'm here, look at me".  Then he makes them do something to break the ice..and it's usually something Venezuelan..'cause that makes everyone feel at ease. JP takes Cassandra back home to cook for her (good move)..then the relaxing part..they are gong to dance! His way..the salsa..but Cassandra is former NBA dancer..so it should come naturally. What does Cassandra currently do?

Cassandra gets the rose!

Group date: Soccer
Ok. Sigh. JP looks looks pretty smokin' playing soccer. Sweat looks good on JP as he's playin with LA Galaxy players. Those are some pretty solid thighs, I mean soccer moves JP.
The girls play a little soccer..they get decent shorts..but all have gold sports bras. They play against eachother. Sharleen takes a hits..but nothing to damage her vocal career. JP helps out team blue.

Soccer is over..I think the red team Juan..I mean won!
JP says..time to get ready for the afterparty at the stadium. This is what I wonder about the Bachelor..so do the women bring all their stuff there and get ready at the Stadium. These girls must be expert packers. Did they full shower? Hmmm..I wonder about these details.
They look great..and hang with JP at the stadium..there's one on one time in the stands, on the field..and even in the kitchen (where Andi gets to kiss JP by a cooler in the short order area)...Kissing JP in a freezer would probably still be hot.
Sharleen and JP are on the field...I'm not sure what JP thinks about Sharleen. He says he has mondo.and class..but that white dress she had one kinda shouted Alexis clubwear to me.(Phase III West Ed for all you non-Edmontonians). She tells JP that it feels organic with him....hmm whaddya mean Sharleen  free-run? yes he is, pesticide free? hope so, Hormone free? (nope..heh heh)..ooohhhh she means natural. I wasn't sure JP would get it..but he did. So she tried to get her organic on with JP on the fake grass...she seemed a bit more into it than he did, she asked for a re-take.
Not natural enough to get the rose...Nikki was the natural choice!

Mac dad (JP) will make you (Chelsea) want to jump jump!!
JP comes to pick up Chelsea.and you guessed it...he wants to make he feel comfortable (aka do something he likes to do)..so they listen to some Spanish music and car dance. Then to further make her comfortable..they go eat some Venezuelan food..some arepas, some melted cheese and apparently Venezuelan orange juice. JP loves that she digs the food from back home. Naturally the next thing to do after a full stomach is to jump off a bridge (this is the doting dad right?).
Here comes the metaphor date! Love is about trust therefore (insert risky date) activity. In this case it is tandem bungee jumping off the bridge. JP comforts Chelsea and they jump!
Then after the jump..they clean up (where?) and head to city hall courtyard  for dinner alfresco. JP wants be loved by Camila and Chelsea just wants to be happy. Well that's enough for a rose..JP can tell she's maternal so a rose..but that's not all...we have another private concert! Ain't no salsa concert. JP tries anyway..apparently just like the polka, you can salsa to anything. JP is a vaquero!

The most important meal of the day

Well okay, the research doesn't support that breakfast is the most important meal of the day, but it's important that JP sees the girls without their rose face on..and surprises them with??!! you guessed it a Venezuealan breakfast..a round of arepas for everyone. Gotta say se ve muy bien en la cocina!
Surprise...no cocktail party..JP wants everyone to relax and have a pool party!!  A round of cheers for JP. The usual shenanigans at the pool party. Obvious kissings, a few meltdowns and some gossip. And you can bet your empanada that Renee will be counselling someone in the bathroom. Chris comes in (with a better shirt) to say there still will be a rose ceremony.  The girls change..and it's time for the ceremony. Eliza  looked crazily bedazzled in that dress. What does he see in her? Lucy and Kristy get sent home. Kristy said it's really hard for her to open up, I think it's really hard for her to walk in heels.

Best line goes to Lucy.."I hope everyone gets what they are looking for because everyone deserves it"..
Awww Lucy..one love.

Until next week..me encanta este show!

Skate, run and pose

We know that JP loves action..so we got some action packed dates. No, not that action..that comes on the FOD.

We had two uno en una fecha and then a fecha de grupo

Clare - the hairdresser. If there is one profession that would serve you well on the Bachelor it would be being a hairdresser. You could deal with any climate they throw at you..and you'd know how to do your own updo. Clare had casually elegant hair, perfectly wavy for her date. JP shows up..with a blindfold.isn't that kind of a reverse 50  Shades of Grey move.(actually dunno..i didn't read the book)..and one girl from the mansion exclaims "I can't believe my eyes, he put a blind fold on her". Whah??? Maybe he didn't want her to see that he was a bad driver.

And where does he whisk her off to..Edmonton!!..oh no..a Winter Wonderland in LA. Newsflash Clare we have killer toboggan hills and ice skating here. The tobbogan unsafely together down a faux hill, together on one toboggan and sans helmets...hopefully they wear protection in later episodes. The irony of a fake winter wonderland on a reality show...this show is tooo much!
Next winter activity..skating!!! Clare can't skate and I think I can skate better than JP..and where did they get those ugly skates. Theylooked like 90s figure skaters.
Clare thinks this is the perfect fairy tale (as opposed to all those imperfect ones). Then then play hide and seek among the fake Christmas tress and JP is having SO MUCH FUN! Clare is monologuing that she can't remember the last time she had this much fun with a guy..but then she also stated she never dates. So uh , i'm not sure what that means.

Amid the wintry fun, there is...a hot tub!! Naturally...and they both have swim wear..and Clare is massaging JP. Pretty standard first date...Clare cleverly states that it is funny that he brought her here..because she was an ice queen..then the camera pans to the snow dripping.

The fun is not done yet..because in the distance Josh Kragitch (??) is singing. Who..Then what happens might be the most awkward private dance/concert party ever. I think JP wants to break out into a twerking salsa and Clare is moving the beat of her melting heart. Next date please!!!



La electricidad!!!
Next date..Kat..can you feel the electricity. JP takes her on a jet plane...she's thrilled!! Miami????New York?? Nope Salt Lake City in running shorts. I think she flat lined momentarily. They are going on a fun run. I mean fun dance. I mean run to dance music with glow in the dark clothing. They stop during the route and dance. And JP likes to dance dance dance..and so does Cat..she more like grinds..and on two occasions I saw serious dance face. They get to go on stage...where JP gives here the rose and they grind some more.  When life gives you roses..grind them into rose petal water. My personal fave part of this date when there were slow motion shots of them dancing.

Group date
These typically involve something humiliating. The group dynamics leads to competition and the 'activity' typically occurs in a state of undress and some women get closer to JP than others.
And true to formulaic group date fashion...a photo shoot..with dogs to raise money for pet rescue.

The big question.would Andi take it all off....the big naked dilemma....and Yes she did ..for the dogs and for JP..because he did do...he is such a good sporty.and super sporty...
To celebrate..a pool party...for more states of undress...Renee plays counselor to Victoria..Renee is pretty sweet. Kelly the dog person totally lacked compassion for Victoria..who clearly had more issues than drunkeness..and Nikki the nurse wasn't too compassionate..i would have expected it from a nurse, not a realtor..but c'est la vie or ask es la vida! Victoria stomps around..and tells some camera guy she's going home..she gets sent to a hotel. JP tried to comfort her outside the bathroom stall. Ewww...such an unsanitary place to site. JP asks the women to make sure she gets home safely.


Next day
JP goes to check on her. Very nice..what was not so nice..was the hotel where she was staying. What a fall from grace. From mansion to motel..or whatever that ugly place was. The curtains in the hallway, yellow rug and green elevator door. I'm guessing it wasn't much cleaner than the floor she sat on in the bathroom at the pool party. JP nicely states that she wouldn't fit into his family life. That's right JP. Keep it classy:)


Rose Ceremony
Cassandra weeps. Renee consoles again. Cassandra is reviewing her child's photos..so people still develop photos..I guess she can't have an iPhone on set. Cassandr and Renee go the bathroom for privacy..lots of weeping in the bathroom here. JP comes to console her. JP likes Cassandra and says he wouldn't keep her from her child if he wasn't interested..good point...he also asked her..how do you know I'm the right guy for you? JP..sometimes you make sense.

the rest was unremarkable..Charlene the Canadian apologized for being standoffish and ungrateful (how Canadian of her). Amy interviewed JP...whoa she's enthusiastic.

in other surprising news..free spirit lucy got the rose. I still think she's an actress. Chelsea's dress was not the most flattering and oddly I liked Cassandra's earrings. Maybe it was the primary colours.

Well..until next week! Me encanta este show!!

27 dresses - 27 vestidos

Yay!! It's baaa-aack..the Bachelor!! and the Rose Report or should I say el  informe de la rosa.

And we have Juan Pablo!! When I heard it was Juan Pablo, I had my doubts about him. He looks fabulous running shirtless and he can handle a soccer ball like nobody's business..but I"m not sure how much more there is to him. His daughter Camila Valentia is adorns...he is portrayed as a caring dad..but I see his parents do all of the caregiving. The one redeeming thing he did say was in the preview of future shows "i'm no here to make a fool of myself"..excellent..some pride..

The show starts with some vignettess of Camila and Juan Pablo..them playing and Juan Pablo (JP)narrating how important Camila is in his life.
He wants to find a wife..and have two more kids..and he' believes in destiny and in being open minded. JP is the perfect candidate for this show.

Sean makes a  Cameo (Word). He shares some wisdom.like having a kissing game plan, keep an open mind and don't get focussed too early. Sean said Catherine wasn't on his radar until a few weeks in (I'm sure she appreciated that being told on national TV). Sean says that when the limos role in that's when it 'gets real'. I appreciated the irony.


After the meeting with Sean, JP has to take a shower and really wash his chest:) It's important to have a clean chest. Shower scene - muy caliente.

A few bachelorette home scenes were featured. Renee the single mom with amazing abs, Amy the slightly off massage therapist who says "I want a man who wants to be rubbed by me"...then she is shown at her table with a meal saying in an infantalizing way showing a fork with food to the camera "I  made you breakfast'. Weird.

Andi..the pretty prosecutor has a faux Judge Judy like scene in court and then there is a shot out of court where she doffed her blazer just in her feminine blouse saying she has a romantic side too. Uh because you can't be smart and romantic at the same time..like they are mutually exclusive?? Good thing the show clarifies it.
Nikki seems like  a sweet pediatric nurse. Whoa.then sad Lauren who tells us that her fiance broke up with her over the phone..she says she's tough. That veneer gets cracked later in the Bachelor mansion.Valerie seems like a sweet personal trainer from the country until she states she could scratch people's eyes out. Yikes.

Limos arrive
JP is looking right in his black suit and skinny tie. He's ready for the 25...no 27 women!!! Bonus time at the Bachelor.
As the cars pull up you can hear the women screaming. Sigh. Pull yourselves together ladies.

What was most evident was the lack of original conversation..most went
Woman "Hi..you're so good looking..I'm so happy its you..the only reason I'm here is because it's you".
JP "Hi..thank you . you look beautiful..thank you"

time 27 women.

There were some attempts to be remarkable..the sciene educator said she was going to do a chemistry experiment but threw away the test tubes (littering :( ) and said how about we just have chemistry.

Kelly brought her dog.
Cassandrea said nothing.
Nikki the nurse brought a stethoscope..nice tie in to her career..also an opportunity for him to focus on her cleavage. Clever.
Elise dazzled him....with her dress. That was some cray sequin/beading going on.
Ashley cute gold star idea..bad updo.
Lucy had a serious down-do. Labelled as a 'free spirit"..I think she's a plant..like an actress. Just a hunch.
Kylie is an interior decorator..but i though her red hair clashed with her Barbie dress. Was it just me?
Christie's dress...was a BCBG esqe dress with a halter..butit kinda looked like a wedding dress...
Charlene the opera singer seemed super nervous but her lilac dress looked gorgeous...and finally Andi looked beautiful..she had a nice ombre hair going on..she kinda reminds me of  a Penelope Cruz.

Cocktail party.
The mood was tense. JP tried to have a dance party..but it seemed super short lived. JP loves to dance..that's his thing.
Almost everyone was busy swooning over or talking about JP. I can't recall who brought the puzzle of JP and Camila with a missing puzzle piece. Super weird.
Amy the masseusse happend to have a massage table handy and gave JP a massage..with oil and through his suit. Bad idea. She seemed super creepy. I was not sure of the type of fabric her dress was made off..foil? leftover New Years decorations? It looks like it would retain heat.

JP gave an example where he was not super intuitive. He couldn't read Charlene at all. He read her standoffishness as nervousness..even when he came bearing a rose..she said "seriously?"...She says off camera that she didn't really feel chemistry..but she accepted the rose from the hot soccer player..that was big of her:)

Rose Ceremonia
I could feel the tension through my small non HD TV. My only surprises that he gave the rose to Lucy (free spirit) and Christie (bandage dress). OH! and poor Kyle mistakenly stepping forward  to get the rose when he called Kat..kinda reminds me of the grade 9 music awards when they called Carol..then i stood up..and it was another Karol...so embarrassing...at least it was not on national TV.
I hope Lauren gets the counselling she needs and learns that a dude wanting to marry you should not make you happy nor does him breaking up with you destroy you...god speed Lauren.


Until next week...Me encanta este show!!!

The most dramatic conclusion: Part deux

Well..here we go part two.
I don't like rollercoasters...let alone emotional rollercoasters. This wasn't really exhilirating..just exhausting.
I love the Bachelor.but this really felt like a long good bye. I didn't really look forward to seeing who she would pick...rather it was just trepidation about how she would pick up the pieces.

So let's pick up where we left off in Antigua.
Des is left with Drew and Chris.
There's a Rose Ceremony...Des tearfully goes through it, telling them that if they accept the rose that they should really want to be there. Meanwhile I'm wondering if Des wants to be there.
It all feels a bit hollow...like she's really still crying for Brooks.

So both Drew and Chris accept and try to comfort her...'cause the last dude left.

There are times where i shake my head and wonder why I watch this weird show..then I remember that I love it..and then I soldier on.

Well..Des is uncertain she wants Drew to meet the family..so she decides to have a date on horseback to help her decide. Smelling like a hot horse is never a good thing.Des approaches Drew on horseback. Then next shot..another horse magically appears and her and Drew go for a gallop. They have some idle chat. Drew tells des he has spent most of the time in Antigua in his room. Odd.  They sit on the sand..and Des immediately tells him. There is nothing bridle (bridal) about this horsey date. It  sees Drew being bucked off off the show. You know what is awesome about Drew, he told her she didn't have to apologize for not loving him. He did such a great job handling the news, compared to how she handled Brooks giving her the kiss off.

Fade to light blue mini van...Drew leaves..

I'm thinking that Chris will meet a similar fate.

This show felt super long..especially with  with 'Bachelor Nation' weighing in. I didn't really care what a random studio audience member thought of what was going to happen.

Chris
Well..gotta say..both Chris and Des look great in bathing suits. They look like the couples you see on couple resort ads. They both have great abs.  Chris and Des hop on a boat..I get the feeling that Des is drinking a bit more to open off...the conversation sees boring and strained..the highlight of the boat trip was seeing a jumping fish.
Des them comes to Chris place...He gives her a journal! But he writes in it...an inscription, a quote, and his poems..who knows if there is any room left for her to write. She responds cooing "you're soo cute". Hmm..wonder if he's going to get a blue mini van escort off the island.

Family meeting.
Nate's back!! Did he get more tattoos?? The family meeting was mainly Nate talking. What is up with that? Nate actually isn't really that tough. He asks Chris.."Why should she choose you". Inwardly "well, he's the only one left". During the family date, I still wasn't convinced she would pick him.
Oddly, after meeting Chris for only 1 meeting, Des' dad said gives him permission.

Decision day.
Still I"m not sure she can pick Chris...
Chris picks a huge ring from Neil Lane's collection and he's ready to propose.
Chris arrives, unshaven. I think he tries to imitate Adam Levine..with the skinny suit and face hair. His facial hair doesn't seem to make his face look bigger.
Chris is about to propose....and then she interrupts him! Whoa..I"m thinking she's going to reject him..but she has to tell him about Brooks. She cleverly says she was blindsided by Brooks leaving, but that just illuminated what Chris was..someone who was always there...That was pretty clever...Chris is relieved and continues to propose. She says yes..
And she'll have a lifetime of chiropractic adjustments...

Dramatic yes...will this last..i dunno.Maybe she loves that he loves her...i dunno...

but what I do know is..
I still love this show.

ATR (after the Rose)

Des wears an oddly studded white dress
Des loves her ring.
Brooks seems like he's on anti-anxiety medication
Drew says the most lovely words..but seems like he has some anger underneath..but he said some pretty textbook k
Des and Chris look really good together....like they should be in picture frames..
Speaking of frames..Chris wrote ANOTHER poem..in a frame no less...

And the next bachelor is....
Juan Pablo
YEAH!!!
te quiero Juan Pablo