Nick is no smoke show..

Wow..this wasn't the Bachelorette..It was the Nickorette show.
Holy smokes (pun intended)...why was there much ado about Nick. I mean...maybe some people find him appealing. Can't say he's my type...He seems to be a bit of a one trick pony. He shows up and is a bit cool, yet communicative..that and maybe some girls like guys who seem to re-wear the hoodie and  jacket ensemble. He re-wore that outfit twice in two days. But the suitcase he was wheeling throughout NYC seemed pretty small. Maybe a few more hoodies, some undies and his skinnies..jeans that is..don't take up a lot of space..and clearly the guy does not use hair products.
There was so much talk about Nick, it was a cloud over the show. If someone really likes this guy..please message what I might be missing. I did notice that his response to kissing Kaitlyn was.."it wasn't terrible"..in a dry, sarcastic way. Wow Nick..you are so cool.

But back to original programming and what happened with he original dudes who went on the show..the old fashioned way..not finding Kaitlyn that new-fangled way of social media-but sending in an audition tape and have an interview. Here are the highlights.

Clint..gets a stern talking to fireside with Kaitlyn who toned down the sparkles for this cocktail party..and just donned them around her neck and waist. I thought Kaitlyn was buying was the story Clint was constructing..but boom! (Relationship) building permit denied!!!  Clint the architectural engineer is out! But not before bro JJ tells him to apologize for the negative emotion in the room. what the JJ? Clint is angered. They have many expletive filled exchanges ...the one I didn't get was the one where Clint insulted JJ's tie? Is that a thing? a tie/shirt mismatch insult? I don't get dudes.
Then JJ is crying...then he tells himself to pull it together...then tells 'Merica..that he is looking for a girlfriend..not a boyfriend. Right JJ. That's the premise of this reality show...maybe he needs some remedial help to figure the premise of this show out.

There is no rose ceremony!!
I'm starting to think there is a rose shortage in LA..guys are punted, ceremonies are cancelled.
I say bring back the rose ceremony...

But it's okay, it's all right..because da boys in da bachelor mansion are going to NYC y'all !!!!

NYC

Group date...keepin' it fresh..
The rap show down was kinda like the poem jared wrote for Kaitlyn at the fancy met date. Some rhyming verses.
First...Shawn's abs put the awwwwww in Shawwwwwwn. Whoa..nice abs..did Shawn actually rap??hahaha..he was kinda funny making fun of Justin's hair.
JJ..actually said NYC ho's in his rap. His name should be DD for Ding Dong.

At the after party..this is where Nick gets introduced and proceeds to steal the show.
what kinda flopping turtleneck/short sleeved shirt was Kaitlyn wearing...I wasn't getting it or digging it.
Kaitlyn floated the idea of Nick on the boat with the guys. I think the boat was actually bobbing in the  water...maybe it was the bobbing..but the idea of Nick didn't sit well with the boys...then they beat the Nick subject to death...wow..that was boring. It does seem a bit weird..but as one guy concluded..if she feels this is right for her..go for it..and what will be will be.

Most boring date in bachelorette history - Jared date.
Not sure if Jared packed a tux..but he came in one..it fit him well..and that's all I can say that is positive about Jared..wasn't this guy all 100% Team Brit? Maybe I"m harsh with Jared because is angular jaw distracts me and seems harsh..but he seemed to echo whatever Katilyn said our wanted. The poem was an effort I guess...and one helicopter ride in...he thinks he's falling in love with Kaitlyn..hmmm maybe I need to catch a helicopter ride...or rub a genie..

Speaking of which..
Group date 3: Aladdin and Broadway
the guys audition..Chris the cupcake guy gets the party. He seems a bit milque-toast..or soggy cupcake. Great for enthusiasm..but I didn't sense any chemistry...but he does have some solid abs...and looks good in a headpiece. Their walk onto the stage, I mean their Broadway debut, went off without a hitch...and the 27 seconds was glorious...Chris encouraging her to soak in every minute and be present.Okay Thich Nhat Hanh, thanks for the tips..this Chris guy can do it all...zen mastery, dental work and Broadway. I think he deserves some type of Bachelorette award. But after their stint on the stage..the date is not over!! They go to see the New Years Eve ball..and Chris exclaims they are the centre of the universe. Okay..so Chris ain't no Copernicus..I mean..noone's perfect:)

Is there a rose ceremony?
No.
But in other exciting news..Nick moves in. Yawn...
But even though there is no rose ceremony.
I (STILL) LOVE THIS SHOW!!!!!!!!